St. Louis County PD Finally Releases Michael Brown Shooting Report. It Is Very Concise.

After 13 days, we finally have the official incident report on the shooting of Michael Brown, written in exhaustive detail by the St. Louis County Police Department after the Ferguson PD turned the investigation over to them.

The document should answer all of your questions about the incident, provided that the only questions you have about the incident are "What date and time did the incident occur?" or "What was the name of the person who was shot?" or "what was the address at which this event occurred?" or, if you're really digging for details, "What was Officer Wilson's squad car number?" or "Who signed off on this document, and which supervisor reviewed it?"

Beyond that, there's bupkis. Literally nothing. It is literally devoid of details on the incident, but it took 10 days to enter, and was only released after the ACLU of Missouri filed a lawsuit to get it.

There is exactly one new detail in the "report": the incident is classified as a "Homicide."

Look:  here it is, in its entirety:

 CARE Incident Report 

</p><p>Pretty darned informative isn't it? </p><p>We can't rule out the possibility, of course, that it's very detailed, but written in <a href="http: //factually.gizmodo.com/british-spies-used-semen-as-invisible-ink-during-wwi-1614656875" target="_blank">invisible ink.</a> </p><p>Fun fact: if they'd adjusted the top and bottom margins just a little, the report could have fit on a single sheet of paper, saving no end of paper as amused journalists feel compelled to print out the largely empty second page. </p><p>The "report" is roughly 250 words long (including the pre-written headings and category labels) and this article that you are reading right now is a touch over 275 words, not including tags and the headline. Congratulations to us, we win. </p><p>[<a href="http://time.com/3159680/ferguson-michael-brown-shooting-police-report/" target="_blank">Time </a>/ Image Credit: <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0312437080/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0312437080&linkCode=as2&tag=wonkette0f-20&linkId=W2AWZOMKDKLZTJWF" target="_blank">Gahan Wilson</a>]</p>