Stolen Girl Summer. Tabs, Thurs., July 31, 2025

Morning news roundup and things to read!

Tabs gif by your friend Martini Glambassador!

Good morning, bienvenue, welcome!

What are we reading today? Some things!

Yeah, Trump’s answer about Jeffrey Epstein “stealing” his property (teenage girls) does sort of sound bad. (Jeff Tiedrich)

Well sheeeit, Trump couldn’t have made his personal criminal defense lawyer Emil Bove an appeals court judge for the rest of his life if Democrats hadn’t chickened the fuck out because Fox News got racist at Joe Biden’s Muslim nominee. (Balls and Strikes)

Not sure why the Tesla Diner (blugh) is able to just put up a huge drive-in screen right in front of an entire apartment building’s windows, guess he didn’t get permits for that! Anyway, neighbors are in hell. (404 Media)

Women are “anti-white” because we’re “weak,” says Elon. If anything it simply makes too much sense! (Gizmodo)

Is Jasmine Crockett a loose cannon? Maybe lil bit! And we love that for her. (And her colleagues should sack up!) (The Atlantic)

Wait, is Texas going to gerrymander her right out of the Congress? And can blue states respond, or are we so good-government that we legislated good rules right into the law? (Semafor) Texas Tribune gets into the gritty. (Texas Tribune)

Democrats are suing ICE over their statutory right to inspect its facilities. Five bucks says SCOTUS says it doesn’t have the right to tell the exec what to do in a fight with Congress. (Suit)

Hey Georgia, here’s where you can look up whether you’re one of the half-million people who got VOTER PURGED. (Fair Fight)

SOLAR SIDEWALKS SOLAR SIDEWALKS!!! (Reasons to Be Cheerful)

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WONKMEET in CLEVELAND with me, Shy, and Cleveland’s newest resident, Ziggy Wiggy! Aug. 16, 1 p.m. at the Boss Dog Brewing Company, 2179 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, OH 44118. I’m buying!

What time is it? It’s time to IMPEACH!

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