17 Comments
User's avatar
PubOption's avatar

Write what you feel, Charlie, don't leave any doubt.

Expand full comment
Lefty Mark's avatar

In my day "plating" was something that you found either on cheap jewelry or on the outside of tanks.

Expand full comment
Lefty Mark's avatar

Wrong. Screamin' Jay Hawkins.

SJH was the spellcaster.

Brown was the pyromaniac.

Expand full comment
Lefty Mark's avatar

Vlad the Puffin wore a <i>shirt?</i>

Expand full comment
malsperanza's avatar

"People are looking at Putin as one who wrestles bears and drills for oil."

Sarah, dear, we know you've been staring enviously across the Bering Strait at Putin's strongman Russia for years. It's time fulfill your deepest desires and go live there.

Expand full comment
PubOption's avatar

Rand Paul wore jeans, Fossil Fuel Guy wore a t shirt. Are republicans more flexible of mind than I thought, or do they not bother to read the rules?

Expand full comment
malsperanza's avatar

That dress-code chart is very handy. Without it, the Young Repuglicans for Freedom would all show up in sperry topsiders, white dockers, and double-breasted navy blue yachting jackets.

Oddly, the extra-short skirt is not on the banned list. That means all four of the laydees can dress like a Fox <strike>skank</strike> news anchor.

Expand full comment
TundraGrifter's avatar

No surprise that Duh Gov' tries a bit in 2014 that the Rev. Jesse Jackson used in 1984: <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watc..." target="_blank">" rel="nofollow noopener" title="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PPxPciXcJvc">http://www.youtube.com/watc...

Expand full comment
malsperanza's avatar

Rules are for the 47%.

Expand full comment
malsperanza's avatar

<3 totally stealing this.

Expand full comment
JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

But he can use it to get expensive floppy disks!

Expand full comment
JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

She's entrancing.

Expand full comment
PubOption's avatar

Invading Venezuela would be a better bet than getting involved in Crimea. The Venezuelan army is puny compared to the Russian, so the Repubs could hope for a quick military campaign, a puppet head of state being installed, and all the oil coming here.

Expand full comment
TundraGrifter's avatar

No. No! NO!

We have already discussed this.

He isn't "Ted Cruz."

He is "Canadian-born Sen. Rafael ["Edward" is optional - I'm not going to be unreasonable about this] Cruz."

Please don't make me point this out again!

Expand full comment
Martini Glambassador's avatar

I chortled far louder than necessary at your amazing list

Expand full comment
Chris Grrr's avatar

"Conervative" should be a real word.

Expand full comment