125 Comments
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Hairstrike Alpha's avatar

Thanks Obama too and also...shit, I don't know how to make the trademark symbol

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I_Buttle's avatar

That cop is so lucky, "The name is Mudd, Bill Muuuuuuddd".

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Hairstrike Alpha's avatar

Nope...it was to keep teh gummint off their backs by filing lawsuits violating civil rights and equal opportunity. Suddenly in the early 1970's one of their presidents/prophets had a 'revelation' that black people could serve in the priesthood which coincided with threats of federal lawsuits. It's similar to why polygamy became "forbidden" (anyone who's lived in Utah knows it's really not), the US government wasn't going to allow Utah to become a state and absolutely refused to allow Utah to become it's own country.

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Hairstrike Alpha's avatar

A slap on the wrist and a position with Grover Norquist's latest tax scam/bullshit thing.

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Paperless Tiger's avatar

DHS maneuvers in the heartland, oh sorry, I mean homeland, and toes get trod. Who would have thought? The judge was obviously too stupid to recruit, so they used him to add a corruption layer since his story is actually believable.

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Amy!'s avatar

...for which his only pay will be a bag lunch and exposure dollars.

So ... cannoli for dessert?

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KA's avatar

Every last one of those bastards needs to be charged, tried and sent to prison--and not a federal prison--a state prison and thrown in with the general population.

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𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Check your quotation marks for curlies. That's what was screwing up my ﹤a﹥ss.

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Notreelyhelping's avatar

Eeeek. I don't even want to know what his unit did in Vietnam.

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Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

Ancient Windows Secrets! (Sorry Mac):

Hold Alt key, hit 0153 on the Number Pad ™When you let up Alt, it appears like magic.

Also, if you want to use other symbols, open Character Map (Start>Accessories>System Tools) -- selecting a character will show the keystroke in the lower right corner.This has been your Bill Gates Barely Useful Tip Of The Day!Now BACK TO THE POOP JOKES

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Briffits's avatar

In Barry Crimmins' hilarious satirical bit about the Clarence Thomas' confirmation hearings, Thomas replies to Orrin Hatch's question as to why his Mormon church changed their policy that black skin was a sign from God that the individual was in league with Satan, "I believe the intercollegiate athletics program at Brigham Young University was beginning to suffer from the lack of black participation". And Hatch responds "I have no further questions".

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docterry6973's avatar

I am sure that the good (white) citizens of Ferguson are shocked and appalled by this news.

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cheetojeebus's avatar

into the sun....after dipping them in benzene, lighter fluid and motor oil, you know, just in case.

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God Emperor Emeritus's avatar

Your winnings, sir.

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Shypixel's avatar

...and here I thought you were smart.

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