Monday again and happy to be spending it with you, dear reader! What’s been happening?
On Friday, Federal Judge April Perry found that there was “no credible evidence that there is danger of rebellion in the state of Illinois,” nor that Trump “is unable … to execute the laws of the United States,” and blocked Trump from deploying the National Guard there. Then Saturday the Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals said the troops could remain in Illinois under federal control, but kept the temporary block on them being deployed. But ICE atrocities continue, and military occupation continues in Washington DC, and Memphis. (Politico)
Meanwhile, in Portland, an inflatable rainbow unicorn married an inflatable Kenny in front of the ICE facility. Congratulations! (Oregon Live)
The regime has seized on the government shutdown to eliminate thousands more jobs, as Trump and Russell Vought have been trying to do all along anyway. Dozens of “disease detectives” from the CDC have been fired (then some were un-fired), and more than a thousand workers at the DHS, and Treasury, and hundreds at HUD and the Department of Education. And USA Today is reporting that the entire Special Education Office has been eliminated. (Federal News Network)
Trump’s clown car is trying its very hardest to pin the shutdown on the Democrats, of course, hoping everyone will forget which party controls all three branches of government. Kristi Noem even released video of her rubber face playing on loop in airports, blaming long lines on Democrats. (Oregon Live)
We’ll spare you the clip, but it looked something like this.
Trump went on a screed Sunday, at 12:38 a.m.:
“THE BIDEN FBI PLACED 274 AGENTS INTO THE CROWD ON JANUARY 6. If this is so, which it is, a lot of very good people will be owed big apologies. What a SCAM – DO SOMETHING!!! President DJT”
Guess Trump forgot he was the President then!
And Melania Trump announced on Friday that she’s been secretly chitchatting with Russian President/bomber of hospitals and playgrounds Vlad Putin for months, and she’s succeeded in getting eight of the estimated 35,000 children Russia has kidnapped returned to their Ukrainian parents. Which is better than none. Though, you know, wacky idea, her husband could try enforcing some kind of sanctions, any kind, on Russia to pressure Putin to return ALL of the children? Maybe even quit sending ICE to kidnap children and parents in America? Don’t be silly! (The Daily Beast)
Kilmar Abrego Garcia remains in US immigration prison, and three African countries, Ghana, Uganda and Eswatini, have refused to take him. (Politico)
Why is Palantir weirdo Peter Thiel going around lecturing small, secretive groups that Greta Thunberg and AI critics like Eliezer Yudkowsky are legionnaires of the antichrist? (Washington Post gift link)
Hundreds of students in South Carolina and Minnesota are being quarantined with cases of the measles. (NBC)
Inmates at Camp Bryant in Texas detailed the special treatment Ghislaine Maxwell’s getting in prison to the WSJ. (WSJ gift link)
Former President Joe Biden is starting five weeks of chemotherapy and hormone treatment for his aggressive prostate cancer. Get well soon, Joe! (NBC)
Literature, Arts and Sports!
The National Museum of The American Indian has some resources for leaning more about America’s indigenous peoples. (NMAI)
The God-botheringest parents of Montgomery County, Maryland fought all the way to the Supreme Court to keep children’s books about LBGTQ+ people living happy lives out of public school classrooms. But so far only 43 families in the county have opted out. (Erin in The Morning)
Terri Lesley, the former library director of Campbell County, Wyoming, will be getting $700k from the county after they fired her for refusing to remove books about LGBTQ+ youth from the children’s section. A separate lawsuit Lesley brought against the local activists who targeted her is still ongoing, with a jury trial set for March. (Wyoming Public Media)
After losing funding, American Public Television and PBS are being forced to auction off Bob Ross paintings. (ArtNet)
Japan’s got a new rising star of sumo, a Ukrainian refugee named Danilo Yavhushyshyn, ring name of Aonishiki Arata. (AP)
Amy Poehler as Pam Bondi’s got the roast-style burns:
Lots going on in the world. It’s time to write like the wind!
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Your hed gif source info: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/fall-goats-but-never-falling-goats
And meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/98e1b500-8ff0-4161-9d3f-39a99299652e
Congrats to the Inflatable Rainbow Unicorn and the Inflatable Kenny for their wedding! May their married life be filled with joy, and when bad times come, they are able to work through it with hard work and whimsy, as they are doing now with ICE in their fair city.