This Teen Woke From His Coma To Learn He’d Almost Won The Milk Crate Challenge. Tabs, Tues., Aug. 31, 2021

Come and get your Tabs!

July was the hottest month in recorded human history. What's scary is that it could prove the coldest month in humanity's future. (New York Times) 

Good old corporate America pledged $50 billion to racial justice causes after George Floyd's murder, so why aren't Black folks swimming in money bins like a porpoise? (Washington Post) 

What if President Joe Biden deserves credit, not blame, for ending the forever war in Afghanistan? (The Atlantic) 

At at GOP event, Madison Cawthorn more or less demanded that we give him "election security" or he'll give us death. He is a sitting member of Congress. (Daniel Dale Twitter) 

He also called the January 6 insurrectionists “political hostages" and “political prisoners.” But a Black activist somewhere said “defund the police,” so Democrats are guaranteed to lose the House.

Madison Cawthorn calls Capitol stormers "political hostages" and "political prisoners." https: //t.co/Qm7E3eheAm

— Mark Pitcavage (@Mark Pitcavage) 1630355463.0 

Soledad O'Brien reads a Fox News blonde dullard for filth. Yes, I realize I should've been more specific. (The Daily Beast) 

The GOP's pandemic-denial policies are inflicting untold damage on vulnerable populations in Arkansas and Georgia. (The Nation) 

The Education Department is investigating five states where MAGA dolts banned school mask mandates to determine if this violates the civil rights of students with disabilities or generally those who prefer living. (Wall Street Journal) 

Cable news is providing an uncritical platform for the geniuses who got us stuck in Afghanistan to explain why we never should’ve left. (Media Matters) 

Kid Rock had to cancel concert dates after a COVID-19 outbreak, but not everything about the pandemic is good news. (CNN) 

Megan Rapinoe kicks ass in Seattle. (Seattle Times) 

I have personal and unrevealed professional reasons for hoping that it’s safe to consume Pacific Northwest oysters. (Eater) 

Bridget Regan will play Poison Ivy in the third season of the CW’s “Batwoman.” Diane Pershing from "Batman: The Animated Series" remains the definitive performance, although Uma Thurman in Batman and Robinisn’t so bad if you’re high. (Variety) 

 Follow Stephen Robinson on  Twitter.  

If you enjoyed this story, please donate what you can to keep Wonkette going forever!