237 Comments
User's avatar
ontheotherhand's avatar

Whaddaya wanna bet those ugly things are locked up in a safe somewhere? Or already pawned? Sounds like mama had some buyer's remorse.

ontheotherhand's avatar

We've got your back. Is that the Casio with the virgin vinyl wristband and the glow-in-the-dark numerals? Built-in stopwatch?

ontheotherhand's avatar

And if someone yelled, "Hey, lady, look, I found it!", I'm guessing her tears would not be ones of relief.

ontheotherhand's avatar

And the timing was damned convenient. I'm impressed she had the self-control to wait three months after the appraisal.

ontheotherhand's avatar

But you get to clock in before you leave the house, and after you return, right? Portal to portal, baby. You're worth it.

phoenix00's avatar

Grifters and thieves, grifters and thieves, grifters and thieves....

A Tad  Sick of the Stench's avatar

No honest person would ever take a $5,000 claim and then explicitly inflate it to $50,000. Just sayin. This trait would seem to bear on Ms. Vermin's fitness for office.

Skippy2000's avatar

Ostrich leather sport band!

newscat01's avatar

You know I wish you luck. I'm traveling this year with an irreplaceable, original oil painting of my cat, and a jar of precious, spa-quality bath oil beads valued at $409.55. Oh, how I hope no one steals my imitation alligator hide tote - or is it genuine?

Rooster Cogburn105's avatar

Junior Miss Panties

Gotta collect the whole set

Excuse me, my guillotine needs sharpening

Rooster Cogburn105's avatar

There, their, they’re, take a deep breath Jim

kareemachan's avatar

The IRS doesn't let you do that. My SO traveled to his job, and they wouldn't let him deduct squat.

kareemachan's avatar

Ah, I see the same three idjits are still following me. Huh, maybe they are the same person with three different accounts?

sgt. jmk de la résistance's avatar

Please let us know how you get on... you know we're all crossing everything we can for you.