Unfuckable face Oh Ted Cruz. You know, of all the people in the political universe we want to be imagining sex scandaling his dong into assorted ladies or gentlemen, Ted Cruz is not one of them. Ew yuck breakfast gone. BUT HERE WE ARE. A few days back, the
It sounds delicious
I think he's a walking, talking smegma heap myself...
I'm sure there is no shortage of hookers in Texas, either, let alone in neighboring Mexico!
Dog-style was invented for these occasions.
If it is Ted Crusty, it'll be like Christmas all over again!
Sinner Dick FTW!
Um, that's not poutine.
Let's hope he goes the Jimmy Swaggart "I have sinned" route!
Sinner Dick??
/dinner sick
Jimmy was immortalized by a pair of Frank Zappa songs, too.
Reminiscing about his youth in the Philippines.
"There is no truth to the rumors I received a hennnnghjob from a DC prostitute!"
How many times did words above make me gag? Lots!
Bet it rubs him the wrong way.
Is sympathy dry-heaving a thing? because I'm feeling a little queasy myself...
"Yes Heidi, I plan to just stay in my hotel room tonight with my personal digital player."