20 Comments
User's avatar
Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

Especially when it's their own...

Vienna Woods's avatar

And then he can go back to shitting his pants, for the rest of what would hopefully be a long, miserable life.

Rabbit_Rebozo's avatar

Wasn't he the creepy uncle in Pippy Longstocking?

Incoming Ham's avatar

Momma's don't name your sons Ted. Just don't.

bobbert's avatar

You know, both of my sons can do that, and I haven't the faintest idea where the control is.

SpideySenser's avatar

I am so sorry, once for you and especially your sister, second because the a**hole got away with it...just HORRIBLE! But not surprising :-( blue wall and all.

WishingIWereThere's avatar

<i>Jaybuss Aytch Crackerjacks</i> is it time to start drinking. I'll be in the kitchen with the 120 proof bourbon. The better to prepare me for the tidal wave of smug racist shit jelly that will surely pour forth today ...

Good_Gawd_Yall - Unperson's avatar

Kickstarting a fund to send Ted a lifetime supply of our favorite salted rat dicks. Sign up and contribute at wonkette dot com.

Good_Gawd_Yall - Unperson's avatar

Also, ignorant pants-shitting super-morons like this have always been with us. Some of them will be with some of us Thursday. We can only hope that their bile makes their tummies ache.

JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

I thought he was gonna say the only thing that stops a bad cop with a gun is a black teenager with a gun.

Ilgattomorte's avatar

HA! Al "not so" Sharpton! "Black Klansmen"! Goddamn but that Ted is a clever guy. His mind is moving so fast that to the rest of us it seems slow. I'm talking Einstein here people. Ted might appear to be an ignorant, redneck bastard with only one undamaged brain cell but that's only because he is so far ahead of the rest of us. It's like the Theory of Relativity - his brain is moving so fast that it's come back around as the mind of a small racist child, or something like that.

JustPixelz: IV%'er's avatar

I googled that ...

First he has to get a majority of Electoral Ass Suck College votes. Then he gets sworn in. After that, he kneels behind your ass and starts sucking.

schmannity's avatar

Since I haven't opened the link, is Nugent one of 15 Medieval Hygiene Practices That Will Make You Queasy?