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TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

My mind went to a weird place when I read “squirrel kits”, some assembly required, batteries not included.

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Shocktreatment's avatar

Gotta read the package, "suitable for ages 13+" it said, but I wound up with a funny lookin' creature and some left over parts...

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Notorious J.I.M.'s avatar

They just won't sit still for complete assembly.

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Tommy Mo's avatar

So, how many antelope squirrels does Harris have? Probably why she lost.

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Pere Ubu's avatar

Antelope, hell

WHERE ARE THE ANTLERS I ASK YOU

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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Usually those only appear during the mating season.

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BosGrl's avatar

How did you find a picture of the 4th graders at my school at recess?

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

LOL!

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Menotsure's avatar

When at play, they seldom hear a discouraging word, and it being the SW, the skies are not cloudy all day. Nice life.

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

But they must take care to not be underfoot when those buffalo roam.

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Menotsure's avatar
Martini Glambassador's avatar

That poster gets a chef's kiss.

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Monsieur Grumpe's avatar

I thought they were chipmunks at first glance. We have several colonies of those little cuties around the house.

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Al Bellenchia's avatar

Rock em sock em squirrilies!

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Bubba Weep's avatar

Now that's just squirrilous.

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Shocktreatment's avatar

There's an owl residing in a lodge pole pine overlooking the alley behind my house.

This severely impacts the small mammal population in the backyard... Good for the birds whose feeders are unmolested, but tough on squirrels and rabbits...

"Nature, red in tooth and claw", maybe Alfred, Lord Tennyson had a local owl too. They can be sloppy eaters...

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Sherry's avatar

However an environment is only supported by the food source available. On years with less rodents, there are less birds of prey as they cannot feed their offspring.

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Shocktreatment's avatar

Once, we had two owls...

The city's perennial rat problem has exploded, I'm guessing that we'll be getting suburban hunters moving in soon..

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Mr Mild - BlueVotingBastard💙's avatar

In good bird and evironmental news, the town of Billerica, MA, recently passed a ban on rodenticides. As the article states, the newer generation of these poisons are more likely to harm birds and other animals, like foxes.

The Lowell Sun - Town Meeting passes rodenticide ban, zoning recodification articles

https://edition.pagesuite.com/popovers/dynamic_article_popover.aspx?guid=276b8657-e2e6-47cb-86fd-abd4c51ed8c3Thursday, May 15, 2025

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Shocktreatment's avatar

I volunteer for the city's (Chicago's) cat TNR program too. We had to work way too hard to get an exemption for rat bait boxes for the alley...

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Mr Mild - BlueVotingBastard💙's avatar

TNR = “Trap and Release”? I’m presuming after Spaying and Neutering?

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Shocktreatment's avatar

Trap, Neuter, Return. Unless there's compelling reasons not to, we try and get them back to where we trapped 'em...

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

It's the circle of liiiiiiifffffffeeeeee

*sorry for the pitchy-ness, my singing voice isn't quite warmed up this AM*

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Linda1961 is woke and proud's avatar

Antelope squirrels! Do they gather nuts in the fall and fly through the trees, even after they grow antlers?

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SkeptiKC's avatar

Those antlers are great for knocking the nuts off of the branches, you know.

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tehbaddr's avatar

"antelope squirrels" WHAR ANTLERS???!!!/1/!!?1/1!?11/?

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Crabman's avatar

I hate to rain on everyone’s parade but antelope don’t have antlers.

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tehbaddr's avatar

OK horns then, like Jackalope!

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

They eventually grow antlers. They can be trained to pull tiny sleighs also too.

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tehbaddr's avatar

Then I want about 1K of them for my regular sized sleigh!

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Li'l Feller will send you an order form.

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

Those are babies. The antlers don't grow in until they hit their first rutting season ;-)

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tehbaddr's avatar

Ah!

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tehbaddr's avatar

Tiny ground squirrel rodents in Lurvs!

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Hannah's avatar

I sincerely appreciate all T. S. Eliot references.

My day is already shit because I can't get that reality show story to leave.

But thanks.

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Cheese's avatar

Thank you for Thornton. If it wasn’t for the animals I would completely give up on the news. May his beans be blessed.

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Cincinnatus's avatar

From NYT article:

“In the ’30s and ’40s, there were numerical codes used in diners,” said Jesse Sheidlower, an adjunct professor at Columbia University whose specialty is slang. “Eighty-one is a glass of water, 82 is two glasses of water, 89 is a pretty girl, and 86 means you’re out of something.”

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Dialectic.Detective's avatar

To be fair, I was once told 86 came from when the mob would drive a person eight miles out of the city and put them six feet underground. ;)

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Denise Donaldson's avatar

During my [too] many years of food service, 86-ing something meant that the restaurant was out of that item for the rest of the day/evening. "86 ribs" just meant not to take any more orders for them. Maybe the places I worked were just too tame. ; )

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Tessie's avatar

"James Comey went for a walk on the beach — possibly in white flannel trousers, while debating the wisdom of eating a peach — then posted an Instagram photo of seashells on a beach laid out to say “86 47,” and rightwing media wants him hanged from the highest yardarm for “threatening” Donald Trump."

`

I grow old... I grow old... some I sent up the river have been paroled.

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Resource NW's avatar

So Comey just meant the normal "86 means throw th e bum out and never let him back in." Normal, but to the MAGATTs it means "Kill him!" I guess, on the theory that all MAGAT accusations are confessions, that when they were posting "8646 hurhurdur," they actually meant "Kill OHJB," despite their protestations.

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fuflans's avatar

i don't understand this performative nonsense. i walked around (a LOT) with an 86 45 tshirt thru the entire first trump admin. i'm sure i'm not the only one.

don't have it anymore because i wore it too much and it got tshirt stinky.

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Resource NW's avatar

Media do not laugh and call them insane. Despite the fact that they are insane. They are shit stirrers, nothing more, but nothing less.

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Georgiaburning's avatar

Which Etsy store is selling “8647”shirts? Maybe the question is “how many”.

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Enter Ranting's avatar

I want that motorized zipper for when I have to open the tent to pee at 3:00 in the morning.

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Enter Ranting's avatar

The whole Qatari jumbo jet makes me want to make a sequel to "The Money Pit, starring Donald Trump as the mark."

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Georgiaburning's avatar

Boeing: “Two weeks.”

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NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

Let’s be honest here: “86” can mean a lot of variations of “get rid of,” up to and including killing someone. In fact, as someone whose memories of working in the food service industry are 35+ years old, I’ve heard it used most often to mean offing someone in a Mob way. So, Comey was at best making an unfunny inside joke about tossing Assmouth out like a fuzzy pot of yoghurt, and at worst definitely saying he’d like to see him put out of our misery. Neither one a good look.

If he was actually completely clueless about what it meant, then maybe don’t post pictures of it? Could have been a gang sign, or the last 4 of someone’s SSN, or the street address for a crack house… Overall, dumb.

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Fifth Dentist's avatar

I'm 60 and I've never heard it used in relation to killing someone.

I've watched a lot of gangster movies/shows and have never heard the don tell a henchman to 86 Bobby the Squirrel.

I think MAGAts are just whiny shit snowflake asshol toddlers who stretch language and logic to get their persecution complex on. That desire to be persecuted is a strong itch for a certain set of USians who call themselves Christians, an urge stronger than a heroin addict's desire for a big fix.

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NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

“MAGAts are just whiny shit snowflake asshole toddlers…”

Without a doubt.

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Lot⁴⁹'s avatar

Mars ain't got no magnetosphere. Bit of a problem for, you know: carbon-based life forms. From a NASA website: "Life on Earth initially developed and continues to be sustained under the protection of this magnetic environment. The magnetosphere shields our home planet from solar and cosmic particle radiation, as well as erosion of the atmosphere by the solar wind - the constant flow of charged particles streaming off the sun."

If Elon wants to go to there at his own expense, though, I'm totally fine with that.

https://science.nasa.gov/heliophysics/focus-areas/magnetosphere-ionosphere/

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NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

I personally would contribute to his ticket. As long as it happened within the next 6 months. And it was one-way.

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Always Be Ithacating's avatar

Jet Li in Romaine Must Die!

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Chris Paine's avatar

Two thoughts:

1) >>a motorized self-propelled zipper that can zip itself up when the user pushes a button<<

Scale this down and it'll be a boon to women everywhere! Imagine not having to reach around behind you to zip up that dress!

2) >> Living on Mars sucks. Mars isn't even mid. Mars is just crappy. The gravity is too low. The radiation is too high. There's no air. The dirt is made of poison. There's very little water. ... It's a deeply unpleasant place.<<

The reason we will go to Mars? Adventure.

The reason we will stay on Mars? 16 Psyche. Mars is a lot closer to that almost literal gold mine than Earth is.

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Karen Scofield's avatar

Love my Tab's and Coffee in the Morning ☕💯👍

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WokeGrandma's avatar

“You must be truly fucking stupid if you think we’re not transparent. The president regularly does multiple press engagements per day and they are streamed live on multiple platforms. […] Stop beclowning yourself."

Stephen Chung, master of the spoken word. He makes Jabba the Hutt look positively attractive.

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Marla's avatar

To me, he's more Oddjob from the old James Bond movies.

May he meet the same end.

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WokeGrandma's avatar

IMO, he's much uglier than Oddjob.

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