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Thursdays with Tina: Sometimes Appears on Fridays Edition
Wouldn't it be awesome if Tina was at the Correspondents' dinner?
TinaSpeakWhat it means12 power players who had all been talking at once about the mess in Iraq suddenly fell silent to listen to the waiter.He spoke English and everything."I'm from the suburbs," he announced, "and I'm voting for Bush."Hey, this reporting thing is easy! "It might seem odd that a savvy New Yorker like me is voting for a guy in a cowboy hat."You just write down what people who come up to you in restaurants say. [H]e recklessly doled out ice cream to a network anchor.Have you everseenan anchor on a sugar high?"[B]ut what we want is stability. This Kerry guy -- he's all over the place."I wonder if this is how Nagourney does it.Huh? Stability? What about all the mayhem in Iraq?Observe my masterful transition sentence.Bait the hook with the absurd "issue" of whether it was medals or ribbons that Kerry hurled over the wall when he was a 27-year-old hothead. Then watch the media bite -- they'll do it every time.If only they were real journalists like me. Look at me here, talking to a waiter. They should talk to more waiters.
New York Dems, having raised a staggering $9 million for Kerry on his last swing through town, now want to see their money in motion. They're vexed with the campaign's sluggish response to attack.
I'm tired of reporting. I'm going to go back to making wild generalizations based on dinner party conversations with my friends.Get his old Vietnam buddies to do a commando raid on the Bush-Cheney mud machine! Get those guys to travel with him all the time in a pack in sweaty old uniforms! Democrats long to bring on a new attack dog with unimpeachable Q ratings.Or, what the hell, I'll just make shit up.Unleash the scimitar chin of Eliot Spitzer!Really. He can cut wheat with that thing.A veep groundswell is building again for John Edwards. So what if he doesn't deliver a state? He has charisma. He's a jury-pleaser. He'll stay cool under fire.I'd fuck 'im." 'This is the moment to strike and watch the poll numbers go UP!' " Stephanopoulos quotes Morris. "On that last phrase, Morris threw his hands high above his head while wiggling his fingers and standing on the tips of his toes -- a political shaman casting a spell, enraptured by his own ecstatic dance."I have patterned my writing style on that of George Stephanopoulos