Today (or Tomorrow) We're All Helen Thomas

The other day (we're old and can't remember exactly when ... or even where we are right now, actually!), the Wall Street Journalposted on the computer thingamajig that Helen Thomas is "the future of America," for being 89 years old and (until this month) still working a day job. Perceptive scribe Brett Arends (America's zeitgeist) listed a bunch of economic reasons for America's Helenization -- no pensions, no savings, no Social Security, no nothing. But what sort of health factors might turn us all ranty a la O.G. Workplace Crone?

The blog WalletPop, which talks about fancy finance things, suggests that people get looser with their language when they get older, and this "uninhibited talk of seniors who say what's on their mind won't fly in a customer service job" like White House press correspondent. Also, aging can affect oldsters' brains:

Someone with dementia or the early stages of Alzheimer's disease will have memory loss that will affect their job. [Dr. Marc Agronin, medical director for Mental Health and Clinical Research at Miami Jewish Health Systems in Miami] said that by age 85, almost half of people in that age group will have Alzheimer's.

"Sooner or later, it's going to crop up at work, there's no question," Agronin said.

Ronald Reagan had Alzheimer's and he never told any Jews to go back to Poland or Germany, though he did once lay a wreath at a Nazi cemetery, which was in Germany. Will historians come to remember Bitburg as Reagan's "Helen Thomas moment"? Why did nobody force him to resign?

Anyway. Physical limitations and problems learning new tasks might also turn "uber maturists" into anger bears. Studies show that anger can lead to prejudice, which often leads to tirades. You go, old girl. Then you GO. But leave your chair, because Bloomberg and Fox News both want it. 

But there is good news! Older workers are generally "wiser and happier" than the youngs, and can even demonstrate more patience as long as nothing or no one pushes their buttons.

Do you think you'll become a Helen Thomas someday? Will your signature moment involve anti-Semitism, racism, or something else? What medium will you use to express it? Discuss your future in the comments -- we can't offer any health advice, but we're happy to listen. [ WalletPop ]