Trump Bad At Taking Corona Intel Briefings Orally, So Unless Someone Wants To Try Giving Them Anally ...

We're fucked.

Every so often in our Trumpian hellscape, we get new reporting about Donald Trump being too stupid and too impatient to participate as a full-blown human being in his intelligence briefings, which are often the only thing on his lazy ass daily schedule. 

Over a year ago, we learned in one of those articles that Trump gets angry when presented with information that runs counter to what he thinks is true, based on his nonexistent expertise on all subjects. He either can't or doesn't read, he thinks he knows everything, he's too dumb to know what he doesn't know, and he only responds well to pretty pictures and the repeated use of his own name. Also he doesn't read his President's Daily Brief (PDB). And he thinks the intel community is the Deep State, out to get him at all times, because he's a paranoid narcissistic sociopath.

It's been like this since the beginning. 

And now, the New York Times has a new one, on how Trump ignores his intel briefings in the time of coronavirus. Trump has seemingly been trying to throw this CIA analyst Beth Sanner, who regularly gives him briefings, under the bus, because in one briefing on January 23 — obviously the only one he got — he told Fox News she told him the novel coronavirus was of "no real import." Sure, we bet.

But ACTUALLY:

But in blaming Ms. Sanner, a C.I.A. analyst with three decades of experience , Mr. Trump ignored a host of warnings he received around that time from higher-ranking officials, epidemiologists, scientists, biodefense officials, other national security aides and the news media about the virus's growing threat. Mr. Trump's own health secretary had alerted him five days earlier to the potential seriousness of the virus. [...]

Mr. Trump has not mentioned Ms. Sanner by name when faulting her Jan. 23 briefing. But by focusing on a single briefing, some former officials said, his criticism seemed both personal and misplaced.

"It's hard for me to imagine her saying something like 'not so deadly,'" said Greg Treverton, a former National Intelligence Council chairman who worked with Ms. Sanner. "But it is conceivable that is what Trump heard and it wasn't exactly said."

And like we said above, we've learned in multitudes of earlier articles that when Trump hears things that conflict with the stupid ideas firmly ensconced in his seemingly syphilitic brain cavity, he just gets mad and/or ignores it entirely.

And that's where the Times gets into just how poorly behaved President I'm-A-Big-Kid-Now is in his briefings these days, which mostly recaps shit we already know, but includes this hilariously terrible factoid:

Briefing him has been so great a challenge compared with his predecessors that the intelligence agencies have hired outside consultants to study how better to present information to him.

That's right, YOUR TAX DOLLARS are being spent hiring "outside consultants" to figure out how to Hooked-On-Phonics up these intel briefings so President Dumbshit might actually learn a fucking thing from them.

The Times reports that Trump's first briefer, a guy named Ted Gistaro, quit because he was "burned out and exhausted" trying to teach Trump a fucking thing. However, in the interest of presenting both sides and being fair and balanced, the Times also quotes Trump's (acting) DNI ( until five minutes ago ) Ric Grenell, an unqualified ass-kissing troll, and also Robert O'Brien, Trump's 857,672nd national security advisor, saying Trump is actually really attentive and curious in his intelligence briefings, so we'll file that under LOL go fuck yourself.

He does ask one question a lot in his briefings, though, apparently: "How do you know?" That is not the hallmark of a curious president, but rather a Fox News-addicted pissmouth who believes "science" and "facts" are a conspiracy against him.

Directly challenging him, even when his numbers are wrong, appears to erode Mr. Trump's trust, according to former officials, and ultimately he stops listening. [...]

[G]etting Mr. Trump to remember information, even if he seems to be listening, can be all but impossible, especially if it runs counter to his worldview, former officials said.

This follows on reporting from the Washington Post a few weeks ago, that "Coronavirus Coming Big Bad Scary!" was in his PDB about 100,000 times going all the way back to January and February, but what did we just say about Trump and reading and PDBs? From what we can tell, if those who prepare the PDBs don't put scratch-and-sniffs with surprise smells Trump likes (Big Mac! Pussy! Pussy Big Mac!) at the end of each sentence, he'll never get there.

As the Post put it:

[T]he alarms appear to have failed to register with the president, who routinely skips reading the PDB and has at times shown little patience for even the oral summary he takes two or three times per week.

He doesn't read his PDBs, he refuses to take them orally, and we imagine even his most devoted ass-sniffers aren't willing to try to administer them anally.

And with that mental image in your head, we bid you ADIEU!

[ New York Times ]

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