240 Comments
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babaganusz's avatar

"Mitchell, nee Cleta *Deatherage* ..."

Where the fuck does THAT ethnic name come from?!

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Megan Macomber's avatar

Trump, well-known golf cheat, wears shoes equipped with Cletas.

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The Lichtenbergian's avatar

"Subscribe to Wonkette, it’s better than crotch rot!" For one thing, you don't *have* to shave your genitalia. Again.

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

Do I need to point out that "Cleta" is the feminine form of "Cletus"?

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kmblue187's avatar

"She talks about chatting with “Mister Speaker,” Mike Johnson, demanding to know what he’s going to do about 'noncitizen voting.'"

Could this be the "little secret" tween Trump and the Speaker Trump keeps giggling about?

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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Marcie. She should have kept her maiden name. Deatheredge could not be a more badass surname. Then again, she doesn't deserve it. I hope her next Cleta Safari is a trip to criminal court.

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Peter MacMonagle's avatar

Criminal Enterprise, thy name is Trump. The Right is pure Rot.

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Carrie's avatar

Tax fraud. Election fraud. Indict & disbar #CletaTheCheater, and make her partisan “charities” pay back taxes.

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Rachael's avatar

Seriously? "Cleta" is worried about other people having funny names?

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DrBDH's avatar

Is Cleta the feminine version of Cletus, like alumna/alumnus?

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Wondering Woman's avatar

No understanding in Mitchellworld that when you insult and alienate people on the regular, they don’t usually support your candidates or policies. Guest cleat will need to lean into her “Cleta tha Cheata” vibe and hope that she can ratfuck enough election stuff to ensure a victory.

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Get Off My Lawn's avatar

Funny that god always tells people to do what they wanted to in the first place.

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Gern Blansten's avatar

“Don’t be a dick Cleta!”

-Her God

“What? What was that? Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?”

-Cleatas-To-The-Head

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DrBDH's avatar

He’s omnicompliant.

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Runfastandwin's avatar

Obviously the money is what changed her.

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Cat Cafe's avatar

Yet another subhuman lowlife whose own inability to deal with what life threw her way turned her into a monster determined to act out her non-resilience by harming everyone she could.

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GrannysKnitting's avatar

ffs - anyone who uses 'god told me to do it' as their reason to break the law/deprive people of their rights should have an additional five year sentence tacked onto whatever else they get for using god as an excuse - if you have to hide behind an imaginary being to excuse your behaviour, then you know you're in the wrong

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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

"...put them in trauma..."

"‘That’s an inappropriate use of what you’re trying to do.’”

In all my years as an amateur doctor I have never heard the words 'trauma' or 'inappropriate' used so clumsily before today. There is definitely trauma going on here but it is the English language being traumatized in an inappropriate way.

This guy helped "write" the Project 2025 handbook? There is no mystery why the agenda included dismantling the Department of Education; no one at Project 2025 was paying attention in English class. They must have considered school a waste of their time and want to ruin it for everyone else.

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