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Permanently Confused@68's avatar

I am 70 yo, 6'1" (formerly 6'2") and weigh 205 lbs on a good day. I have an unwanted and, imo, unfair middle-class-white-man beer belly. I should be at around 190#, at least. I80 would be awesome, and which I was most of my life, until I stopped my actually active lifestyle of mountaineering, skiing, and cycling. Seeing the depth and breadth of T's ass, and the fact he's supposedly 6'3", I would say there is no way he's an ounce under 250. Prolly closer to 275. And since when is "attending meetings" "active"? Is that a grammatical distinction used as a subterfuge, instead of saying "meetings are being attended by..."? And GOLF? As Yoda might say: "Break me a fucking give."

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Anzu's avatar

There is a 98 year old resident in my sister's group home. She does NOT need to be in that facility - she has reached level 2 needs, and it's a level 1 assisted living place, but there aren't any other beds in any of the higher level facilities open, and it's thankfully still illegal to just dump someone on the streets when they are too much of a problem.

She has severe Alzheimer's and no longer recognizes anyone or anything around her. She is belligerent to the staff. She keeps falling out of her bed and her chair because she is so weak. When she falls, she screams for help, but she fights the staff members who have to lift her back up, so they have to do a team lift for her (best practice, anyway.)

I feel SO bad for her, because it seems like her mind died long ago but her body refuses to quit. Her family stopped visiting very often because she doesn't recognize any of them either and she's gotten violent and angry with them.

Anyway, this is the path that the Cheeto is currently headed down, it seems.

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Megan Macomber's avatar

When rosacea is "controlled," it is controlled with drugs. What is he taking? I've long suspected those steroids they gave him for Covid turned into a habit--one that could be concealed with other medications. The guy's a rager anyway, but sometimes the rage seems dialed up WAY past Eleven.

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Permanently Confused@68's avatar

My gf controls her rosacea with tinted sunscreen or rouge. Not to defend the bastard, but "controlled" is in the eye of the beholder.

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Mommadillo's avatar

You know Morgan Fairchild is almost as old as Trump, right?

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Eureka's avatar

I read it in the voice of Jon Lovitz’s Tommy Flanagan bit.

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

"President Trump’s days include participation in multiple meetings, public appearances, press availability, and frequent victories in golf events."

Maybe they are unsure on the meaning of the word "active"?

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Dirk MacDiarmid's avatar

From the Archive

Dear Teachr

How are you.

Over Spring break Donald drank plant food and ate a pound of fertilizer.

Please keep in shade and water regularly.

Also NO GYM CLASS EVER!!!

OK!?!

Thanks

Mister Fried Tramp

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skinnercitycyclist's avatar

And two boiled eggs.

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JCfromNC's avatar

From Tumblr user cypheramnesia:

//

I was thinking we need to find whatever keeps mean old bastards like Trump alive even though you can see every cell in his body dying in real time, his skin is nearly liquified, but anyway it's just money, I remembered, everyday motherfuckers like him and Mitch whatever get like the national budget of Luxembourg dumped into their bodies, whatever cocktail of drugs and devices it takes to prop up that processed pressed meat product of a man, and keep his rotted out black heart pumping his putrid blood through his brain long enough to fire off another few billion synapses of racism, because that's the only thing his whole nervous system has left. Like every day they crank him up, wheel him out, and juice that fetid sac of wet garbage for one more poisoned cup of hateraid, then they staple him back to the seat in the oval office and rotate him every six hours. There's nothing special about him, a particularly loud mosquito fart could unravel his DNA into a pool of orange soup on the floor, but some team of freakishly expensive doctors are 24/7 committed squeegeeing together 20 gallons of meat glue a day to hold that human slop in shape.

//

(link in case anyone wants to see the original post, but above is the entire text)

https://www.tumblr.com/cipheramnesia/780410153213329408/i-was-thinking-we-need-to-find-whatever-keeps-mean?source=share

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Permanently Confused@68's avatar

"Meat sock". --Men in Black.

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Tessie's avatar

"...and his personal hygiene is above reproach."

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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Gary. I've known couch potatoes who are more athletic and fit than That Thing. He lies about everything; he's lying about this. He's as fit as a fatberg. I hope it catches up with him, sooner rather than later.

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Brianna Amore's avatar

We are rapidly approaching North Korean levels of absurdity. Soon we will find out that Trump has no anus and he always manages to hit 18 holes in one.

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julie elder's avatar

Maybe he weighs that little for his obvious size because he’s made of marshmallow fluff? 🤔

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Anzu's avatar
Apr 15Edited

It's all fat and no muscle tone. Linebackers who weigh 280 lbs often appear smaller than expected because SO MUCH of it is muscle and they are so very dense. It's the opposite with the Cheeto.

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Permanently Confused@68's avatar

All of the Cheetoh is very, very dense, imo.

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julie elder's avatar

Oh! I suddenly remember how the football players at college would fluff out when off-season. Losing their muscle tone made a ‘uuuuuge difference.

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Anzu's avatar

Odds are good those guys were in a "dirty bulk" - definitely gaining some fat, but also working to build more muscle underneath. Dirty bulks are when they let the athlete eat whatever they want with no monitoring, and they're not considered to be.... not the best way to go about it, if that makes sense. Gaining 30 lbs, of which 20 lbs is fat and only 10 lbs is muscle, is dumb when they can just feed them exactly 500 calories more a day in protein and put on 10 lbs of muscle and 1 lb of fat instead.

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julie elder's avatar

Makes sense!

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julie elder's avatar

So yep—fluff. No substance.

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DemoCat's avatar

Mister prezident, your balls are as big as your lies. YUGE.

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DemoCat's avatar

Mother Nature isn’t fooled, and neither are we.

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VasyaCognito's avatar

Hoodlum 🇺🇸

‪@nothoodlum.bsky.social

“The doctor came up to me after my cognitive exam with tears in his eyes and said ‘Mr. President, sir, we’ve never had a patient who identified every animal cracker before.’”

https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:sk6jryjhuavqchpa53jlcsyu/bafkreib3ieettia7vz7epc7zzvbhqvj5hegfqsynbgwrbbtqli44mhyhli@jpeg

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Thorn Spike's avatar

We also learned Trump has a benign polyp on his colon, which seems like a very mean way to refer to Lindsey Graham, though not nearly mean enough.

That's no polyp, that's a Ladybug!

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Erisian's avatar

"Given President Quarter Pounder’s history of transparency and honesty about his health, you can take this to the bank."

While you're at the bank, I highly recommend trading in the "Trump One Dollar Bills" you've been hoarding. Also, may I suggest that you put in your pre-issue order for "Trump $250 bills?

-----

"And also because it’s Trump, and the next time he or anyone around him tells the truth about anything will be the first time."

I see the Fulvous Fuckwad and those circling around him as Reverse Pinnocchios; their noses grow whenever a truth slips from between their lips.

-----

"Remember how in his first term, Trump’s doctor reported that he was still 6’3” and weighed 239 pounds

...

Also, he now weighs a svelte 224 pounds."

Remember the good ol' days when Mooseballs Mussolini was booked into the Fulton County Jail?

> "Trump’s booking record declared the former president’s height to be 6-foot-3 and his weight 215 pounds — nearly 30 pounds lighter than his disclosed weight at the time of his last official White House physical." https://www.washingtonpost.com/national-security/2023/08/24/trump-height-weight/

Personally, I find it intriguing that even after losing fifteen pounds between Mooseballs Mussolini's last WH physical and the current storybook report, he's ***still*** over the weight he is recorded at during his intake at the Fulton County Jail. I'm not sure who to believe: a shit-for-brains who doesn't have even a passing acquaintance with the truth or official medical reports.

-----

"We’ve got more scarring where we’ve had moles removed much further in the past than last July."

I've got family in the medical profession who doubted the gunshot theory from the get-go. The tampon the Amber Ardipithecus ramidus wore on his ear was not there long enough for any real healing to have occurred. The Mango Malignancy played his role as a victim to almost perfection while downplaying the person who played the victim card to its ultimate end (RIP Mr Comperatore, you were in the wrong place -- a Sandstone Snowflake rally -- but you died a hero trying to protect your family).

-----

"We can’t wait to find out what five words are going to replace “Person, woman, man, camera, TV” in his constant bleating about his fantastic mental state. Dog, orange, diaper, car, Marxist Democrat thug! Horse, baseball, chair, plant, Melania!"

The doctor used more than five words, but they are words that Pumpkin Pestilence uses more than once a day:

> "Leftist, Socialist, Fascist, Communist, LGBTQIA+ loving, Drag show attending, Disloyal, Unpatriotic, Out to destroy our country Libs," and "Radical Leftist Judges."

-----

"His name was Ronny Jackson, and oh boy, was he fun. Y’all remember him?"

* I refuse to refer to Jackson as Doctor. He might have been very good at his job, but he sold his integrity like Mehmet Oz and Phil McGraw.

* Jackson is like the other RINOs who don't let facts disrupt their narrative:

> "In December 2019, after 25 years of distinguished service to his country, Dr. Jackson retired from the United States Navy as a Rear Admiral." https://jackson.house.gov/about/

And yet:

> "“As a retired U.S. Navy Rear Admiral with nearly three decades of military service I understand the commitment and sacrifices made by servicemen and servicewomen to serve our country,” the two-term Texas representative writes on his congressional website, posted to a page listing his work on veterans issues.

But Jackson is no longer a retired admiral. The Navy demoted him in July 2022" https://www.texastribune.org/2024/03/07/ronny-jackson-white-house-navy-demoted/

Please note that the House bio is current, and he was still referring to himself as a retired Rear Admiral almost two years after he was demoted. This is a lie by omission, he *did* retire as a Rear Admiral, but he continuously fails to note his demotion.

fnord

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