511 Comments
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bcb's avatar

I suspect he's going to say "The economy is FAILING because the Democrat Party made me lower the tarriffs on China!"

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LOU LOU's avatar

Merit-based Trump administration is by far the biggest in your face gaslighting aside from racism against Afrikaners seeking refugee status in the USA.

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mr_snarky's avatar

If you subscribe to Starlink Elon can listen in on your conversations and read your emails but shhh don't tell anyone.

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Stephen St John's avatar

“Let me tell you, this country will be like a rocket ship that goes straight up.” Sure they will, Donnie. Sure they will.

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Maybe's avatar

Note that a rocket ship that goes straight up is also capable of promptly coming back straight down.

And trumpy won't blame Scott B. and Mr. Mattel for empty shelves. He'll blame Biden. Or Hillary. Or Clinton.

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Regret's avatar

Rocket ships shouldn't go straight up, generally speaking. You won't ever reach orbit that way. The trick to reach orbit is to move sideways fast enough that gravity's pull is just strong enough to make you not fly away from the planet but not strong enough to make you go towards the planet.

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Notorious J.I.M.'s avatar

Biden, that doddering old criminal mastermind. Deftly working the levers of power right under donnie's nose.

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I Stedman's avatar

Brick? Tick? Flick? Crick?

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Fifth Dentist's avatar

Unfortunately, one of fElon's companies makes the rocket ship, and it will have a rapid unscheduled disassembly before it is 10 miles off the launch pad.

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Fender Deluxe's avatar

"Or maybe he DOES know, because he thinks all the little girls and their families will be grateful to have fewer dolls to play with."

Or, put this way:

Trump: "the little girls will have less dolls to play with."

Aide: "Fewer."

Trump: "Don't call me that in public."

(This will never get old.)

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Aocm🇨🇦's avatar

G7: will he or won’t he? Be allowed to enter Canada? Want to go to Canada? 🤔🇨🇦

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Jens TINGLEFF's avatar

That Guy might like to control all spending, but what makes him tick is the stock market manipulation. We know this, because his (would be) henchman Roger Stone squeals extra double loud when it is pointed out.

“𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘨𝘰 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘶𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘤𝘬 𝘯𝘰𝘸,”

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motmelere's avatar

When he says, "We're gonna get rich!" he is referring to his real-life billionaire buddies.

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Maybe's avatar

Similar to when musky announced that the economic changes would cause some pain. Just not to him.

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Cody Unrath's avatar

Who’s going to Tell him about the whole Mattel M-16 thing?

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jltympanum's avatar

Little Donnie is so proud of his BIG BRAIN. Well, an elephant's brain is bigger that yours, DonJohn.

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Lady MS's avatar

IIRC, this is the presser wherein Cheeto digressed into a snarky rendition of Mayor Pete’s lifestyle, while Scott B. held his…Diet Coke, I guess.

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Gern Blansten's avatar

“Let me tell you, this country will be like a rocket ship that goes straight up, and then wow look at that uncontrolled disassembly and very sad rentry happening BOOM -BOOM! The straight up part was Trump the BOOM-BOOM that was all Biden.”

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Hank Napkin's avatar

Prepare to squint because the lights are going on in even the darkest, dumbest places:

"...the president in recent weeks has expressed growing dissatisfaction that he hasn't been able to deliver on his promise to end the war in Ukraine and has even taken to wondering if Russian President Vladimir Putin has been stringing him along."

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Stephen St John's avatar

I'm suspicious of that statement. because it implies that Trump actually cares about keeping one of his promises.

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Hank Napkin's avatar

Yes. He deeply, sincerely, fearfully cares about keeping his promise to Putin.

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Fifth Dentist's avatar

Wow, he are smrt!

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Should we tell him?

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Hank Napkin's avatar

Best let Sir get his head out of Sir’s ass all on his own.

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Hank Napkin's avatar

No rejoinders? OK. How about: It's so far up Sir's ass it's already his head again.

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