Trump Promises To Protect His Followers From Foreign Commies Who Hate America

What year is this?

In a speech on Saturday, recently indicted former President Donald Trump promised the right-wing Christian extremists at the annual Faith and Freedom Coalition gathering that, if elected again, he would ensure that communists and Marxists would be barred from immigrating here and becoming American citizens.

He also told the group, who had apparently been bussed in from the year 1952, that there should be some kind of law that would allow them to do something about communists and Marxist Americans who were born here. Given this group's understanding of communism and Marxism, this would include practically everyone to the left of the Proud Boys.

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He said:

Today I’m announcing a new plan to protect the integrity of our immigration system. Federal law prohibits the entry of communists and totalitarians into the United States. (BIG CHEERS!)

But my question is what do we do with the ones that are already here that grew up in it? I think we have to pass a new law for them. (ALSO BIG CHEERS!)

Using federal law and section 212-F of the Immigration and Nationality Act, I will order my government to deny entry to all communists and all Marxists. Those who come to and join our country must love our country. We want them to love our country. We don’t want them when they want to destroy our country. Welcome to America, we want to destroy your country, thank you very much. So we’re going to keep foreign Christian-hating communists, Marxists, and socialists out of America. We’re keeping them out of America.

Following that, he promised to keep that Dalton Trumbo fella from writing any more screenplays and accused Ron DeSantis and Chris Christie of the armed robbery of a Massachusetts shoe company.

It is true that our immigration laws (specifically the 1952 McCarran-Walter Act ) do still technically bar those with a "membership in or affiliation with a communist or totalitarian party" from naturalizing — and this includes the Communist Party USA — but it is also true that the Cold War is over and has been for several decades now.

The fact that this law is still even on the books in a country that supposedly prides itself on freedom of speech is absolutely revolting. Perhaps we should thank him for reminding us of this so that we can update those regulations after Democrats win again in 2024.

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