Trump Reps 'Art Of The Deal' Selves Into Caving To China AGAIN
This is all so embarrassing.
Well, well, well, a waxen Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent and tousle-haired trade rep. Jamieson Greer have emerged from a weekend of talking in a conference room at the Intercontinental Hotel in Geneva, where the Chinese team yawned and probably picked at a lovely hotel fruit platter while Scott B. and Jamieson Greer haggled with themselves over how much dolls and pencils should cost back home.
Scott B. and JG ended up with a final offer of 30 percent for 90 days, after Trump had talked himself down to 80 percent on Friday. Hey, those tariffs were supposed to make us RICH RICH RICH and make all the little girls grateful! What happened to that?
The 30 percent is 10 percent plus some 20 percent because of fentanyl-something, and the Chinese were like, sure, whatever, we said a month ago we would match whatever percent you do, so 10 percent on our side, and we’ll let you buy critical minerals again. Now we’ve got to hit up the gift shop for cuckoo clocks and chocolates then hit the airport. Later, dummies!
Watch Jamieson and Scott B., both looking haggard and miserable, explaining that this is all China’s fault for reciprocating after Trump started the whole thing, leading to an effective embargoing of ourselves. Behold how Scott B.’s heavy pancake is not blended with his neck or hairline at all while he tries to say this is all big strategery, we were just negging, us and China are still a couple!
But China has already found new suppliers for its soybeans and such. It’s the economic equivalent of shoving pencils and Barbie legs up your nose because it feels so good to pull them out, but giving yourself a brain bleed in the process.
Trump’s art o’deal is supposed to be about screwing the other guy, and surprise, America, you are the other guy! Thirty percent is still a massive stomach-stapling, highest since the Depression, a regressive tax that will make for price hikes all over the place, and hit Joe Bigbox Shopper hardest of all. The tariffs are on pause for 90 days, and/but who knows with Trump, he could get a bug up his ass at any time, really.
But this does help insiders who follow his stock tips get to schlong the market!
The dollar is surging and the Wall Street journal is gushing “Surprise U.S.-China Trade Deal Gives Global Economy a Reprieve,” but, how much of one and for how long remains to be seen.
Will the slow boats from China start coming back into port with their ready-to-be taxed lucre? Will our stevedores be contenders again? Will voters properly blame Trump for making them pay 30 percent more for video games, car seats, cars, and sports equipment for their handsome little boys?
We shall see!
Will shipping resume?
Would you gamble that your $1m+ order might cost you an extra $1m, without warning?
No, no you fucking wouldn't.
The only thing that really fixes this is Congress taking the gun away from the monkey.
So probably not any time soon.
Scott Bessent has resting open casket face.