442 Comments

"Birx" is the sound I make if I drink a Pepsi too fast.

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Hair like one of those troll dolls.

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Ratings gold - why didn't anybody think of it before this?

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The dumber members of his base wouldn't recognize him.

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archie and mehitabel are on the job.

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"Invisible China Virus???" How many ways can you go fuck yourself you orange shitbird? I will spend the rest of my life wondering how/why my fellow citizens voted for this cretin, this fucking idiot to be POTUS. It keeps me up at night, I swear to god.

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Makes me want to vomit, just like that jingoistic crap song does.

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One of the few good ones.

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I believe she loves her son.

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I have never watched a single thing he has said for more than, oh, maybe 10 seconds. Not on TV, not on the intertubes, not in person or pre-recorded. Not. Once. I have too much respect for myself. And as sure as BigMac-scented-shitstains-on-his-skivvies I STILL ain’t going to watch one fucking word from here on out.

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It’s like when you hold up a sheet in front of you in your doorway and then drop it as you step away, and your dog goes batshit thinking you disappeared. It’s like that. Only with masks, and god.

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Lovely crocheted COVID virus. Just the thing for the kiddies to play with.

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The one about the rockets' red glare?

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I'm just spitballing here, but I kinda think your husband had taken his mask off and a lot of other stuff too when he caught clamediea.

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