485 Comments
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DemoCat's avatar

The reason I think jurors might prefer to acquit Trump, is because at least a few of them probably have a reasonable fear of retaliation by Trump and his unhinged cult, and the reward for civic duty if they convict the SOB is zilch. So, acquit and go home and resume life, hopefully in anonymity, or convict and feel mildly proud of assisting with justice, while forever looking over your shoulder because you voted “guilty” about the MAGA king lord and savior. It’s a very real problem.

Gingerwentworth's Theory's avatar

That's the most depressing idea I've heard in a long time. It could be true, I know.

Mike Gesing's avatar

Some wag on DU posted that Barron is appealing the graduation ruling.

William Donnell's avatar

He's already up to his ass in the surf off Zanzibar. Fucking amateurs...

Teddy Barnes's avatar

At first I thought "shit, those other parents must be pissed now that Assholini will be their to steal the lime-light from their kid"........then I remembered, They're all rich fuckwads who worship this ass lick. They probably have graduation notices printed with the addendum *President Trump will be in attendance*......Not FORMER president Trump mind you.........that would be blasphemy towards their golden idol.....

Glennis Waterman's avatar

I have to disagree. No one hates Donald Trump more than the Upper East Side rich folks who send their kids to the same schools his kids went to.

Teddy Barnes's avatar

Barron Trump attends Oxbridge academy in Palm Beach FL.

Atrele Kasha's avatar

"But when it came time to defend the Big Man himself, New York magazine reports in an interesting profile how the law firm Cadwalader told him he had to choose between being partner and representing Trump, who promised to “make him famous.” So he left his cushy white-shoe life to head three out of four of Trump's criminal defense teams, instead."

Technically true, but that's not a good thing in this case. Fool.

a. diderot's avatar

Nice post Ms. Jones, this is fun, well written, snappy and charming. It is the second time that I read something that I really like, wondered who wrote it, and found out it was you. Looking forward to reading more. I really like your style.

Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Marcie. What does it take to get into the Estrogen Mafia? Or do I not want to know? Does it involve kissing The Godmother's ring?

Hello_who_dis's avatar

How much estrogen does one need to join the mafia? These questions need answers!

NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

I, for one, would welcome the Capo degli Estrogeni.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

That sounds like some obscure secret sect within the Vatican.

Sherry's avatar

Oh stupid child. All you have to do is ring the call button and a worker will open the case for you. I do it all the time and it’s not hard to do at all.

Look on the bright side: You're not a black woman wanting a hair care product that is just the same cost as for white textured hair but as everyone knows, Black women steal everything ALL THE TIME.

Cry harder dummy.

Anzu's avatar

Now the Turnip is going to be required to go to the graduation, which he did not want to actually go to, because if he doesn't go the judge probably will find him in contempt of court again.

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

According to the press, he already reserved a tee time for that day at Bedminster.

Sherry's avatar

Barron probably didn’t want him to go either because Daddy will make it all about himself. Poor kid.

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Junior and Eric will be so jealous. If only a judge could have forced their Dad to attend their graduations.

Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

To a certain degree, even if it were Joe instead of Pendejo, going would be hard for it not to become about dad, but unlike, Joe, Pendejo would actively make it about him.

Would UPI have covered the graduation of Chelsea McNobody from Stanford?

https://www.upi.com/News_Photos/view/upi/8fad71bae14ac1aa91a20140be20d463/Chelsea-Clinton-Graduates-Stanford-University/

Edgar Allen Shmoe's avatar

Hello HYOO-mon commerce worker, can you please direct me to your SKIN LOTION? My tentacles-er-elbows are in need of hydration

Tessie's avatar

"Seven fingers is normal, right?"

JoannaJeannineJanet's avatar

I want to go out with a member of the estrogen mafia - I think she'd wear nice suits and maybe drive a convertible.

Major Kong's avatar

She'd wear a short skirt and a looong jacket. Sharp as a tack.

beb's avatar

Just avoid driving near the Grand Canyon.

Crabman's avatar

Does Subaru even have a convertible?

gullywompr's avatar

Closest I can think of is Ocean's 8. In terms of a go-out with them, I'd consent.

Seek's avatar

Being of Manx descent and having been there last fall, I will say BS on Isle of Man not being a country. They have their own currency and everything. They’re a protectorate of Great Britain but aren’t part of that thing. That’s why you go there for money laundering and tax avoidance! There are signs in the airport warning you not to hold baggage for strangers because drug cartels are active in the area and you could get caught with drugs or more likely bundles of cash for which you have no explanation.

ETA: The Isle of Man or Mann, is a self-governing British Crown Dependency in the Irish Sea, between Great Britain and Ireland. per wikipedia

Doloras LaPicho's avatar

My favorite fact* about the Isle of Man is that the national food is the toasted sandwich.

* that a comedian made up

JoannaJeannineJanet's avatar

"Being of Manx descent" - so you're tailless and your coat is hypoallergenic?

Plain Marie's avatar

No, but there are a lot of curly, red haired pale people. Per my grandfather et al. Probably immigrant Norwegians per ancestry.

Seek's avatar

They are freaky as shit on person as most of the males have at least one of their 4 horns broken in fighting with each other.

JoannaJeannineJanet's avatar

That sounds sort of frightening

Bel-Ami's avatar

"Eric puts the lotion in the basket wait no that is you putting money in our pocket." Oh, that is great! And yes, i do (subscribe, that is).

Free beach's avatar

Kristi Noem wants to meet with you and cricket and Clarice! Yum!

TalentNotAutotune's avatar

Someone else who could've sunk PAB was Nancy O'Dell. PAB bragged about trying to bag her but couldn't get there because she was married, even though he "moved on her like a bitch".

She was asked about it and replied "No comment". If only she'd confirmed he'd acted reprehensibly and she rebuffed him because she was a married woman and had no interest in an affair with a married man. Oh well!

Glennis Waterman's avatar

In hindsight, that was very smart. Can you imagine what hell her life would be like from his flying monkeys screaming at her?

TalentNotAutotune's avatar

I think that in hindsight, her inaction is responsible for the election of PAB. And we know what living hell OUR lives have been as a result of his election.

So I respectfully disagree with you.

Bitter Scribe's avatar

𝘞𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘯𝘰 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘺...

Honestly, I don't know if you could even say that. Even if Trump's supporters had known about Karen and Stormy, would it have made a difference? I'm thinking probably not -- look at all the other shit that's come out about him, before and since, and how none of the Trumpies care. They'd probably think it made him more virile, or something.

OTOH, they did make an effort to influence the election, and it's the attempt that counts, not whether you succeed (despite what Bill Barr says).

NH is for 🦡🍄🐍's avatar

The only reason I think it might have mattered was our old neighbor. Lovely lady, perfectly human, a nurse and a teacher, who voted for Assmouth in ‘16 (not in ‘20). When asked why, she said, “Because Hillary took Bill back; I just couldn’t respect her.” She came to regret her life choices, and MAYBE if more of the philandering had come out before the first election she might have changed her tune in time to matter.

SunMoonStars's avatar

How many times have we seen this up close and personal? If he ate babies on 5th Avenue the right cult will never leave him. Those who have stated he is not fit for office are now backing him again.