Trump: What If We Just Did The Obama Iran Deal ... BUT STUPIDER?

Art of the Deal, everyone!

Let's end this week the way we start and end every week: by shaking our heads and marveling at how goshdang DUMB the current occupant of the Oval Office is.

After all the fanfare of Trump pulling out of the Iran Nuclear Deal ostensibly because the Iranians weren't in compliance (they were), but really because it had Obama's name on it, Trump has decided that maybe he would like to do some Obama Iran deal for himself, albeit in a specifically dumber and Trumpier way.

Approximately eight and one quarter seconds after Trump ridded himself of this meddlesome John Bolton, the Daily Beast reported:  

President Donald Trump has left the impression with foreign officials, members of his administration, and others involved in Iranian negotiations that he is actively considering a French plan to extend a $15 billion credit line to the Iranians if Tehran comes back into compliance with the Obama-era   nuclear deal .

Trump has in recent weeks shown openness to entertaining President Emmanuel Macron's plan, according to four sources with knowledge of Trump's conversations with the French leader. Two of those sources said that State Department officials, including Secretary Mike Pompeo, are also open to weighing the French proposal, in which the Paris government would effectively ease the economic sanctions regime that the Trump administration has applied on Tehran for more than a year.

That sounds really cool. Sanctions relief for compliance with the nuke deal, it's like ... deja vu all over again!

Basically, France would extend a $15 billion credit line to Iran, backed by Iranian oil, and all Iran has to do is follow the rules of the thing it agreed to and abided by way back in 2015. Neat.

So what's changed? Oh, well, you see, we are just guessing Trump noticed that he doesn't have a photo op with Iran on his Wall Of Dictators I Am BFFs With, and with Bolton outta the way, it's time to get one! It's like an Elizabeth Warren selfie line, but evil and stupid.

As the Daily Beast reminds us, Trump seemed to be caught a bit off guard at the G7 when all of a sudden Iranian Prime Minister Javad Zarif showed up, afterward trying to say that Emmanuel Macron had asked him permission to have his Iranian pal over, whereupon Macron made clear that he had informed Trump that Zarif was coming over to play Naked Twister, and if Trump didn't want to play, he could be the guy who spins the wheel, we guess . (Sorry, we know it is Friday and we have just given you a mental image of Donald Trump playing Naked Twister. All our condolences for what's happening in your brain right now. HE ONLY LOOKS SO ORANGE BECAUSE OF THE ENERGY-SAVING LIGHT BULBS, DAMMIT.)

To Robert Malley, who worked on Iran policy during the Obama administration, that visit indicated that "Trump must have signaled openness to Macron's idea, otherwise Zarif would not have flown to Biarritz at the last minute."

"Clearly, Trump responded to Macron in a way that gave the French president a reason to invite Zarif, and Zarif a reason to come," he said.

OK.

"I do believe they'd like to make a deal. If they do, that's great. And if they don't, that's great too," Trump told reporters Wednesday. "But they have tremendous financial difficulty, and the sanctions are getting tougher and tougher."

Yeah, sure, great, yep.

The Daily Beast notes that these recent events -- the stick of slamming Iran with sanctions, combined with the carrot of saying you'll stop if Iran will sit the fuck down and play nice -- is a lot like what happened just before the Obama Iran nuclear deal was signed. But don't call it the Obama deal! Obama BAD!

Of course, and obviously, John Bolton was very much against this. Now that this news is coming out, it seems like the Iran situation might have been the real reason Bolton left, as opposed to his anger over Trump's naked hair-braiding slumber party with the Taliban at Camp David, which the president wanted to happen SO BAD. (We apologize, we know, it is Friday, and now you are also thinking about a nude Donald Trump lounging among the Taliban getting his Yeti pubes French-braided. Thoughts 'n' prayers for however long it takes you to recover from all this. It's a pity we'll be leaving you alone with your anguish soon.)

Steve Benen at the MaddowBlog notes that as recently as this very week, Mike Pompeo and the Munch swore up and down that they are still doing "maximum pressure" to Iran, and that it's just working great. Of course, it never was working great. Indeed, it was reported on Monday that Iran was hitting the accelerator some more on its nuke program, which is golly such a surprise, since Trump pulled out of the nuke deal that incentivized Iran to cut that shit out. You know, the one Obama negotiated.

And now he, Trump, is thinking maybe he will do the Obama thing. Ayup.

Have we mentioned that Trump really really really really really really really really really wants to meet with Iranian President Hassan Rouhani at the UN General Assembly this month? And ... mayyyyyyyyybe get a selfie for his wall mayyyyyyyyyyybe pretty pretty please Mr. Art Of The Deal wants everybody to think he did some Art Of The Deals, and if he's too dumb to create one for himself, he can always just tear down an Obama deal so he can put together the same-ass deal Obama already did, and call it something different? PLEEEEEASE? 

Senator Chris Murphy, expressing his feelings:

So Trump is going to give Iran $15 billion to come back into compliance with the agreement he tore up because it wa… https: //t.co/96EReH5YTj

— Chris Murphy (@Chris Murphy) 1568247427.0 

Ours too. The president of the United States is a dipshit.

All righty! Have an open thread and a good weekend, if you can get Trump's French-braided pubes playing Naked Twister out of your brains, LOLOLOL BYE!

[ Daily Beast / Maddow Blog ]

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