Hey, y'al! Is there a speaker of the House yet? Is it George Santos? Is it Hakeem Jeffries? Is it the MyPillow Guy? All hail new House Speaker MyPillow Guy!
Anyway, while we wait for Kevin McCarthy to fail some more, here a thing. Charlie Kirk got Tucker Carlson to come on his YouTube show the day after New Year's, if that tells you anything about the relative quality of either man's life.
The lighting was dim.
The conversation was philosophical.
They talked about the meaning of life. Looking up at the stars. Et cetera, et cetera.
And then Charlie Kirk made it weird by talking about doing a "blitzkrieg to a female's body to change their nature from female to male."
Or maybe that didn't make it weird at all, because Tucker giggled.
Maybe that was exactly what Tucker wanted Charlie Kirk to say right then.
Here comes weirdness:
TUCKER CARLSON: If you knew who you were in the scope of things — if you spent, like, twenty minutes staring up at night, on a cloudless night and looking at the stars — I mean, you know, I'm not sure you would achieve enlightenment, but you would achieve perspective.
And you would recognize your place in the cosmos which is infinitesimally small and totally forgettable in the scope of things. Like, you're nothing. And that's just true. And we don't want it to be true but it is true.
It's like Jodie Foster saying Carl Sagan quotes in Contact , except for Charlie Kirk is there and his face looks like that and it's kinda hard to focus on the vast majesty of the universe when that thing above is looking at you.
CARLSON: And so, knowing that, you probably wouldn't imagine, you wouldn't convince yourself you could restore permanent peace to the world by putting in place a fake democracy in Iraq. Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
OK, Yul Brynner.
CARLSON: That you couldn't, you know — effecting regime change in Russia would fix everything.
Tucker's lying on the grass with Charlie Kirk having a romantic moment and he still can't resist an opportunity to slip in a quick love-tickle for his real dad Vladimir Putin. Amazing.
CARLSON: You would know there are limits to your predictive powers as a person and maybe you should scale back your ambitions as a person a little bit, consistent with your abilities, which is pretty limited, actually.
CHARLIE KIRK: The same people that wanted to bomb Baghdad now want to blitzkrieg a female's body to change their nature from female to male.
Donald Rumseld and Dick Cheney are doing gender reassignment surgeries?
CARLSON: [GIGGLES] Right!
Guess so!
KIRK: It's the same thing.
It's the same!
KIRK: We are going to impose our will on what is to what we think ought to be.
CARLSON: One hundred percent. We're in charge of nature.
KIRK: Yes.
One hundred percent.
OK, well, this has been a nice visit with Tucker and Charlie Kirk and their weird conversations about blitzkriegs on people's bodies.
Now back to your regularly scheduled Kevin McCarthy Has Chosen To Stay And Fail shitshow! They're on failure vote number THREE now.
Watch here in your OPEN THREAD.
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Yes. But you have to peal them. Which sucks.
So I was a little off. Can I either stick a number in front of my original guess or better yet up it by an order of magnitude?