698 Comments
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Hippo Heaven's avatar

Marcie, since you know so much about baby bumps, would you be willing to comment about Meghan Markle's hospital dance video?

CI Carlson's avatar

Genetic anomaly: Usha is smart and beautiful—but not white!

Richard Von Busack's avatar

Ha! “Spatchcocked”! I recall the story of some beloved SNL writer who died of The Cance, and she said oncologists tell their male patients that their tumor is the size of certain sports balls, whereas the female patients are told they’re the size of certain fruits.

As for their two-headed love child…if our kids aren’t smarter than we are, we’re cooked.

Neural Foundry's avatar

Sharp piece. The detail about advanced paternal age contributing to pregnancy risks is somthing that rarely gets mentioned in these discussions, but it's crucial. We talk alot about maternal age but ignore that older sperm carries its own genetic baggage. The irony of them bragging about excellent military care while pushing policies that deny that same level of monitoring and intervention to everyone else is just staggering.

Marlee Ostrow's avatar

Don't forget about who else is carrying a dusty sperm baby, that liar Leavitt! Isn't her old man 60?!

insert_something_creative's avatar

Okay, JD Vance is terrible and I feel sorry for any child born into that household

But as a 35-year old woman who wants to have a kid within the next 2 years, I'm like 😳 reading the pregnancy/childbirth/child development stats on this from a known expert

Bren M's avatar

She must have put on a slipcover rather than a negligee.

Susan Niemann's avatar

"Genetic anomaly"

These fucking people... WHY!???? 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Marcie. Shady Dunce entirely lacks what the kids call rizz. Yes, I'm old enough to know it's their shorthand for charisma.

The AI Architect's avatar

Sharp breakdown on how age-related genetic risks manifest diferently when theres actual medical access. The chromosomal abnormality data here really undercuts the whole "natural outcomes" framing they use to justify limited intervention. I saw similar disparities in practice whn working with high-risk OB cases, and it always came down to resource access creating completely different trajectories.

Thomas B.'s avatar

Is there a "kumquat" pregnancy stage? Just wondering.

tehbaddr's avatar

"Usha spatchcocked herself on a wet spot on the couch"

That is disgusting and filthy! I love Marcie's writing!

My Erdos Number Is Five's avatar

Sorry, he’s just plain gross. Or deluxe gross, whichever.

Hank Napkin's avatar

KInda like back in the day when the nice girls got pregnant from sitting on a toilet seat.

Wookiee Monster's avatar

Spoiler: it will be revealed that Usha had IVF with an egg from Erika that was fertilized from sperm harvested from Charlie Kirk’s corpse.

Hank Napkin's avatar

Not only plausible, but likely!

Wookiee Monster's avatar

You know, it’s bad enough Nazis have ruined Norse mythology for the rest of us, but why do these fascist tech douchebros have to ruin Tolkien too?