Want To Unsubscribe From Automated Donations To Trump Campaign? Too Freakin' Bad!

No, really, somebody walk me through stopping these fucking payments...

 Article updatedfor people who found us by searching "how to stop automatic donations to Trump" or something like that; please see update at end. 

Sad news for people who jumped on the Trump Train but are starting to have second thoughts about it, now that it's morphing more fully into the Crazy Train: People who set up monthly donations to the Trump campaign are discovering that if they want to cancel, the campaign's website doesn't provide any obvious means for halting the automated monthly withdrawals from their bank accounts. Do tell us more, Mic.com!

On Wednesday, CNN reporter Jeremy Diamond tweeted a screenshot of an email from a disenchanted Trump donor who alleged that the campaign has not returned voice message requests to cancel contributions (The identity of the alleged donor is not shown).

Hahaha, what does that silly person think CNN is, the Channel 5 Action Team?

The good folks at Mic proceeded to set up a $1 recurring donation, then took screenshots of their attempts to cancel it using the Trump campaign website. They found options for switching their regular payment from one credit card to another, but not to remove their payment information altogether. And if you can't switch your payment to a cancelled card or a bunch of nonsense numbers, either: Those fuckers want a valid credit card number or nothing:

Now, you DO get a confirmation email from the campaign -- but it doesn't say dick about how to stop your payments or report problems, either. You can click "unsubscribe," but sorry, that's only for the email list. Your money will keep marching off to Trump like the brooms in Fantasia. Which YOU probably saw while you were dropping acid, you damn hippie.

For comparison purposes, they set up a recurring donation for $1 to the Hillary Clinton campaign, and that resulted in a confirmation email that included an email address to contact in care of any problems; the Clinton website also offers a linky to clicky to remove your card information and stop the monthly donations:

Mic even notes approvingly that if "you log out and log back in to Clinton's site, you can see that your card has been deleted."

Now, it turns out that there is a way to cancel monthly donations through Trump's site, which Mic goes on to explain, but it's a multi-step process that's not the least bit intuitive -- nothing so obvious as "remove card" or "cancel recurring donation." Also, if you set up a donation that's in a large enough amount, the Federal Election Commission just might investigate you for campaign fraud if you end up giving more than the maximum allowable $2700 to a single campaign. Fun, huh?

Not that you would ever even dream of giving your hard-earned Ameros to Trump anyway. You would much rather throw your disposable income at Yr Wonkette, which you can do in several different ways explained on that link right there. And this one right here, which goes the same place! We just want to make sure you notice the donation link. )

If you do not trust the computers and their vile sorcery with your money, you can even send a check, money order, or bar of gold through the mail, although we don't recommend that last one. Checks (payable to Rebecca Schoenkopf, because “grifting”) can be sent to PO Box 8765, Missoula, MT, 59807.

You will also note that right over there in the right margin of your Wonkette page (as well as at this donation linky ) are buttons what allow you to make either a one-time donation, or to set up a monthly subscription. And while it is true that we do not have a "Cancel my subscription" button -- making us JUST LIKE DONALD TRUMP, EEEEW! -- if you should decide for any reason you want to change or cancel your subscription to Wonkette, you need only send an email to Yr Editrix atrebecca at-sign wonkette dot com,and she will get you all cancelled -- or perhaps resolve whatever difficulty made you mad at us!

If you're having issues with automatic deductions going to the Trump campaign, try the steps in the article at Mic.com. 

Also, have we told you lately that we love you? We really do.

UPDATE/CLARIFICATION: We've gotten at least two emails from people who misunderstood the paragraph about donating to Wonkette, which originally read, "if you should decide for any reason you want to change or cancel your subscription, you need only send an email to Yr Editrix..." They thought it meant she would fix their problems with the Trump campaign's automatic deductions. We are happy to emphasize thatwe are in no way connected to the Trump campaign!They need to fix their stupid website! We've changed that to read "if you should decide for any reason you want to change or cancel your subscriptionto Wonkette..."

If you're here because we showed up in a search for how to stop donating to Trump, try the steps listed at Mic.com And consider voting for Hillary!