Wonkette

Share this post

Where's Your Mayor Now?

www.wonkette.com

Discover more from Wonkette

Wonkette is filthy, hilarious, liberal news. YOU CAN HANDLE THE TRUTH!
Over 15,000 subscribers
Continue reading
Sign in

Where's Your Mayor Now?

Ken Layne
Jun 8, 2007
Share this post

Where's Your Mayor Now?

www.wonkette.com
Share
Jesus, left, and dead mayor, right. - Wonkette


The beloved mayor of Rosemont, Illinois, died just two months ago after more than 50 years as the leader of the busy village. But Mayor Donald Stephens angrily vowed to return to our dimension should his son ruin his legacy.

"He told me, you screw things up, I'm gonna haunt you," said his 44-year-old son Bradley.

Apparently things have been screwed up: A tree stands outside the village's health club -- a tree that Donald Stephens twice saved from the chainsaw. And now the 4,200 people of Rosemont see their dead mayor's angry face in the bark. They have placed a candle and, uhm, a barricade near the tree and consult it like an Oracle.

But a local heretic who works as the gym's membership director insists it's not the mayor at all. "I see Jesus," she lied.

 Some see dead mayor's face in sycamore tree [CNN]

Want to just donate once?

Share this post

Where's Your Mayor Now?

www.wonkette.com
Share
Previous
Next
Comments
Top
New
Community

No posts

Ready for more?

© 2023 Commie Girl Industries Inc.
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start WritingGet the app
Substack is the home for great writing