339 Comments
User's avatar
Feeling Groovy's avatar

Stubby index fingertappin' out your code.Stubby index fingerlookin' like a toad.

We could all use some "Evil Roy Slade" about now.

Lefty Mark's avatar

I happen to like the look of big, strong milkmaid hands.

starfanglednut's avatar

Conservatives never change their minds to accommodate reality. They expect reality to change to accommodate their ideology, which it never does. Hence the perpetual state of rage and terror.

starfanglednut's avatar

I would have. The high cheekbones, slitted eyes, and expression of unmitigated meaness give it away.

Zyxomma's avatar

I believe that's Official White House Hand Embiggener. And my hands are quite small (glove size 6-1/4, but I always buy 6-1/2 because, apart from a few vintage pairs, 6-1/4 is impossible to find; pinky ring sizes 2-1/4 left, 2-1/2 right, etc.), but they are proportionate to the rest of me, unlike that freak in the WH.

MegaSolipsist's avatar

Actually, a professional psychologist has publicly diagnosed him with malignant narcissism. Scary stuff, though not altogether unexpected.

Dragon with the girl tattoo's avatar

or this dudehttps://youtu.be/axHb7lj-LaI

Questionable Whackelpudding's avatar

Well, I was really excited to make a witty comment about the author's largish hands by asking, "Oh, hey, do you know what else I hear is large when someone has large hands?" and then I realized Robyn wrote it, so now I'm all, like, "THAT'S RIGHT! INTELLECT!" (And how dare you think I was going anywhere else with that, you perverts!)

ExecutorElassus's avatar

right? *swoon*

I mean, obviously nobody else really should feel invited to butt in and tell women what they think about their physical appearance relative to that of other women or conventional beauty standards. But I'm a musician, and ladies with strong capable hands (shake hands with a pianist or a harpist and check that grip strength!) make me *weak*.

ETA: is "milkmaid hands" a thing? Is "strong farmgirl" a thing? I feel like there's definitely a subgenre out there where this is a thing. brb reading rural agricultural fanfic.

ez's avatar

I got hands so big you'd swear I had Squids grafted to each wrist. Shake my hand too strongly and ink squirts out, big amounts too.

ez's avatar

https://uploads.disquscdn.c... right next door to where Handel lived.

/#!_No_Name's avatar

Women with big hands give the best high-fives. Be proud of your awesome, capable hands, Robyn, as they are stylish, practical, and put Trumpy's mitts to shame without Photoshop.

YayConspiracy's avatar

He got the best inferiority complex. A real beautiful thing.

FreddieFree's avatar

I have small hands and a PhD in Physics. I have an above-average tallywhacker that has never let anyone down, including myself. That's what's interesting about the human body. There are no stereotypes.

Marion in Savannah's avatar

At this point you're lucky if you can even find gloves that are sized other than "S, M, L, XL." And I'm with you — even the S are usually too L for me.