2677 Comments
User's avatar
Pixeloid's avatar

"To give the UCP the benefit of the doubt..."

Why would anyone ever give any conservative the benefit of the doubt? No matter what you think their intentions may be, it's always worse than you imagined.

rmontcal's avatar

Unsane Clown Posse?

CanadianBacon's avatar

Not ALL Canada . . . Some of us are heretics who don't follow the religion of Hockey.

Stulexington's avatar

I like Hockey, I just don't care for the NHL. "The season opener has been delayed a month, because they haven't finished the playoffs from last year!"

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Yeah. I was never particularly enamored about hitting little round flat things with my stick.

rlcornelius's avatar

1. They are stupid.

2. They think they can control him.

3. They believe he will give them unlimited opportunities to amass more wealth (tax cuts, repeal of regulations, etc.)

4. They like his fascism, because it's anti-democratic and democracy gets in the way of their greed -- they don't want to share even a penny with the riff raff much less let any of them make any decisions that could possibly affect their betters, as the billionaires see themselves.

5. They don't think Trump would or even could turn against them. They believe themselves to be well insulated from any negative consequences.

6. See number 1.

Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

Orange Turd is easy to manipulate. Joe is not.

El Bastardo's avatar

"Why is a group of billionaires..."

There's your problem, right there.

Mr. Minky's avatar

Because, if he's president, they can what ever the fuck they want.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Yup. This ain't no rocket surgery here.

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

Thinking about adding something new to the birthday list:

Today is:

Gregorian: Monday, 3 June 2024

Mayan: Long count = 13.0.11.11.2; tzolkin = 13 Ik; haab = 5 Zotz

French: 16 Prairial an 232 de la Révolution

Islamic: 26 Dhu al-Qada 1445

Hebrew: 26 Iyar 5784

Julian: 21 May 2024

ISO: Day 1 of week 23 of 2024

Persian: 14 Xordad 1403

Ethiopic: 26 Genbot 2016

Coptic: 26 Bashans 1740

Chinese: Cycle 78, year 41 (Jia-Chen), month 4 (Ji-Si), day 27 (Wu-Xu)

Julian day: 2460465

Day of year: Day 155 of 2024; 211 days remaining in the year

Discordian: Prickle-Prickle, Confusion 8, Year of Our Lady of Discord 3190

El Bastardo's avatar

If there are four other people in the room, you are the Fifth.

Law of Fives.

Mr. Minky's avatar

If there are four printers in the room, you will find a fifth.

El Bastardo's avatar

This sentence five words does.

Bobathonic's avatar

If you out 5 Zots in your mouth at once, fizzy foam will come out your ears.

El Bastardo's avatar

Cancatononnez: 1961

Alessandre Codresque drew a shell into the sand with a stick, and invented the Spaceman drink, Tang.

Rocket Cat's avatar

Weird story about Tulsi’s Samoan retired UH professor aunt getting murdered with a hammer. I just accept the reality of Russian KGB mind kontroll now

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/tulsi-gabbard-s-aunt-brutally-murdered-author-charged-after-incriminating-evidence-found/ar-BB1nu5k4?ocid=BingNewsSerp

Mr. Minky's avatar

So, for the past week, I've been going down the Tick-Tok video rabbit hole on YouTube. A lot of Dylan Hollis, and little sketches.

Once in a while a RWNJ pro-gun one will come up and tell me what I don't know about guns (of course they miss the point that it isn't the guns, it's the idiots with the guns but since it's impossible to find the idiots with guns before they kill a bunch of kids, it's easier to remove the guns.)

But I have found Miniminuteman aka Milo Rossi who debunks archeology woo. Those are fun and I subscribed to his YT channel.

rlcornelius's avatar

I enjoy his videos too. In fact, I was just watching his latest before coming here....

Rocket Cat's avatar

Part of it is the necessity of policing archaeology in the intelligence services

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Yeah, I subscribe to Miniminuteman also too.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

Spawn watch that guy ^.^ He is good.

Though I am a little jelly with all the places he gets to go, the rat bastard.

User's avatar
Comment deleted
Jun 3, 2024
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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

It doesn't make my blood boil but it does make me laugh myself to death. (I get better.)

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

I liked the one he did on that Aussie canyon being some twin Pharohs or whatever, and then casually mentions how the park ranger /found the guy who did it as he was doing it/ which is why it is all gibberish, and rather superficial.

Was a very lol

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Graham Hancock is one of my favorite clowns.

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

What could go wrong?

𝗣𝗮𝗹𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗿 𝗯𝗮𝗴𝘀 $𝟰𝟴𝟬𝗠 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗣𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗻𝗷𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗯𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲𝗳𝗶𝗲𝗹𝗱 𝗔𝗜 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗿𝗲 𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘆

Uncle Sam wants Maven Smart System to be in use across DoD by 2029

https://www.theregister.com/2024/05/30/palantir_us_army/

Bobathonic's avatar

Come onnnnnn, Giant Meteorite!

Crip Dyke's avatar

The other day Land Shark was pulling for Marvin the Martian & the Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator.

Bobathonic's avatar

Also a worthy alternative.

El Bastardo's avatar

Okay, wow.

As you can probably tell, I do love you.

I don't know what I meant by that previous comment - I retract.

I previously misspoke.

Mighty Little Dog's avatar

Hunter standing trial and potentially being convicted sure shows how Joe Biden manipulates the justice system like a tool for his nefarious purposes

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

Fuck it, if presidents can do whatever they want, he should just pardon him and be done with it.

Reminder: dude not only paid his back taxes, he also paid the interest fines. This is one of those things where if it were you or I, or anyone but Hunter Biden, it would NOT be going to trial.

Mighty Little Dog's avatar

Definitely. The deal they had was reasonable

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

I owed them 200 bucks once. They were very nice and let me pay installments (this was when I was still VERY poor, as opposed to moderately poor or, right this moment, not actually poor at all which is a new thing I am still not used to but surprises me every time I go to pay my bills and can).

Not one person suggested I go to jail.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Zero-Sum thinking taken to an extreme: If Trump gets convicted *SOMEBODY* they hate *HAS* to be convicted, law be damned. Some idiots need to be slapped with something wet and sloppy.

Rocket Cat's avatar

Puke. Lock up Steve Dermatology Patient Nixon Bannon and I will believe there is a system of justice

Bradthe🤖's avatar

Ummm, that’s imminent; prepare to believe!

El Bastardo's avatar

Whatever I might have said, ignore it.

You lovely monsters, try to continue to be you.

I cannot love all of you.

Attempt to be well.

.

I do not love you.

El Bastardo's avatar

Simba seems like a hoopy frood. But, I don't see their towel.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

Simba loves me

this I know

For our Hammy tells me so

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Added to the National Liturgy Of Hamiltonstan.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

You should declare Simba a god, and form a church.

Making the commandments could be fun.

1: Thou shalt not push thy religion on anyone else, jesus, why do I even need to tell you this one

El Bastardo's avatar

That is the first, and only, Commandment.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Simba already did that, except he hates churches. He'd rather open a "drive-through theatre" whatever that is.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

Drive through mass.

WANT.

*Body of christ?"

"No thanks, I'll just take a cup of the blood and an order of fries"

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

It's all right, Bastardo, we can love you instead.

Whomever said love is a two way street clearly never owned an indifferent cat *Eyes MeiMei*

El Bastardo's avatar

Chiggy!

How can I be incorrect with you.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

Oh no, I'm Jen, Just a rubber one today cause that story still amuses me to no end (I mean really, he had the Secret Service steal their rubber chickens. That will never not be funny).

Our Chicken who is much greater than I is not me and now I feel bad for impersonation XD

El Bastardo's avatar

You did not impersonate.

I misread.

.

And, thank you.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

She really is the bees knees and the cat's pajamas tho ^.^

Love you, chicken <3

ya know, there's a whole buncha people here who make my life that much better. I am fortunate to have wandered into wonkette all those moons ago

El Bastardo's avatar

I wandered in, also.

We (me) are glad to have your wit and wisdom, friend.

Please, continue to carry on with us.

El Bastardo's avatar

Goddammit.

You know me.

V4Virginia's avatar

Today on Virginia's Obsession with SovCidiots Getting Arrested:

Florida cops seem to be getting the hang of this. Here is the fastest arrest I've seen so far:

https://youtu.be/AF1QhtogPUI?feature=shared

Bradthe🤖's avatar

If they all handled that bullshit the same way that cult would die a lot faster.

V4Virginia's avatar

I agree 100%! If you stand there and argue with them about Marbury vs Madison for 20 minutes they think there's still a shot and this is just the wrong cop. Nip it in the bud! Nip it!

Sleepmonger's avatar

Pro tip: don't blame your malapropisms on spellcheck when the word you used is misspelled.

Opalescent Riddles's avatar

I have some incorrectly spelled words in the dictionary that the keyboard app draws from for both autocomplete and autocorrect. So the spellcheck component could autocomplete a misspelled malapropism that escapes a hasty proofread.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

My cardiologist told me that my malepropisms are non-threatening.

M-X's avatar

And then my haute au correct.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Sounds like a stodgy perfume.

M-X's avatar

It is a rather bossy sort of cuisine.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

I was thinking more of the ambiance. Or is it ambience? {{{shrugs. Takes a studebaker-sized hit. Wanders off.}}}

M-X's avatar

I blame my ottercorrect.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

I think that's what I have. It's more noticeable to readers when I'm stoned like I am now.

M-X's avatar

Does it squee-chatter? Does it gnash crustaceae and bivalveae?

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

yes

no, it eats krill with it's cigars.

V4Virginia's avatar

I can't tell you how often I have to google words to see if they're spelled correctly because I know some words spellchecker apparently doesn't, and at the same time I can't remember half the damn time how to spell words I used to know perfectly well. Olding is fun!

Sleepmonger's avatar

Same here, but if I accidentally post the wrong word because of auto spellcheck, it would at least be spelled right. :)

Note: I don't use auto spell check for anything because I can't trust it. I do note the red underline to help me spot mistakes though. I just don't let it have its way without my supervision. :)

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

True story: years and years ago, so many jobs ago I've lost count, I was given a task of writing a report which included a lot of copy pasting for certain parts that never change, like regional geography and what not.

Anywho I put the thing together and did fine on it, but I just ran a quick spell check instead of actually putting my editor hat on.

Which is why I had a whole paragraph devoted to a flower mill.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

Forget which word it was, but the red underline kept whining and when I right clicked it did not give me the word I wanted, and it turns out it was cause I was using an a instead of an i. All the other letters were correct, and in the correct place, but the spell check could not figure it out XD

I felt less bad about myself

Linda1961 is woke and proud's avatar

Good morning!

#Worldle #864 (03.06.2024) 1/6 (100%)

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🎉

🧭⭐🚩🔤🗣️👫🪙🏙📐

https://worldle.teuteuf.fr

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

This is how we grow our next generation station of political activists and community leaders.

So they were actually trying to groom them?

*rubs eyes*

Fuck, at our HS, they don't let freshmen go to the senior prom let alone get "inspired" by a buncha 20 somethings.

Teen Laqueefa's avatar

New lung cancer pill produces “unprecedented” results in human trial

https://newatlas.com/medical/lung-cancer-lorlatinib-trial/

Crip Dyke's avatar

I saw that.

Only about 4% of lung cancer patients have the type of cancer that responds to this treatment, but for those who do it's absolutely incredible.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

That would be nice for anybody who can afford $10K/dose.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

Quoth the ubercrapitalist.

Crip Dyke's avatar

So... everyone in Canada.

Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

I really want to become a real Canadian so that I won't have to lie when I tell people that I'm Canadian.