Wonkagenda: Friday, 07/22/2016

Well, a good Friday to you, wonkers! Here's some of the things that may grace the pixels of yr Wonkette today.

Before you go any further, here's a little nicetime to get us started!

Silly bunbun, you can't drink coffee!

• • Donald Trump accepted the Republican presidential nomination , and then proceeded to scream at America for over an hour last night.

  • The 2016 GOP convention was a poorly managed flaming shit-show mired in idiotic mistakes, divisive rhetoric, general chaos , but we can ALL agree that Ted Cruz is an asshole.

  • Trump's Stepford daughter introduced her sperm donor in an attempt to humanize him. 

  • Spiteful dickhole Peter Thiel trolled everyone during his speech by reminding people that he was gay. Too bad the entire platform hates the LGBQT community.

  • Trump's Nixon-era campaign chair, Paul Manafort, thinks all the ladies like Trump because he'll put their asses back in the kitchen where they belong, like Betty Drapper, or something.

  • Barry Bamz doesn't give a shit about Trump's wall, so he's bringing Messican Presidente, Enrique Pena Nieto, back to the White House AGAIN.

  • The smart money is on Hill-dawg to tap Tim Kaine to be her Veep, but it's still up in the air. Hillz has a few names on the list, and will announce within the next 48 hours.

  • Fox News chief executive and chairman, Roger Ailes has been booted out of office by Emperor Palpetine impersonator, Rupert Murdoch.

  • In case you missed it, check out this ballsy Code Pink protester getting arrested during Trump's hate orgy, and this sissy fight between Cenk Uygur and vile tub of shit, Alex Jones , during a livestream of Uygur's, "The Young Turks".

  • John Stewart came back for a minute to remind us all how much we really, really miss him.

And before we go, just remember, wonkers....