Wonkette Movie Night: Fierce Creatures

'Oh don't worry about Terry; he wouldn't hurt a fly. Well, actually, he would hurt a fly, being a Mexican red-knee tarantula.'

Fierce can be used to describe many things — fierce winds tear branches from trees; the fierce passion of their love; the fierce, fiery burn of hot sauce.

Jamie Lee Curtis IS fierce. 

But the fierce that Rollo Lee wants for the Marwood Zoo is raging, ferocious and wild beasts. He is a corporate yes man employed by a wealthy entrepreneur whose only goal is to earn more money.  Rollo has been given a mandate from his boss Rod McCain to make the zoo earn a 20 percent profit. The way he believes he can make that happen is by using "violence." Rollo states that based on his experience at Octopus TV, violence will bring an audience. Violence equals danger, risk and excitement. He reasons it's what drives people to see Sylvester Stallone movies. He makes the announcement to the zookeepers of what will be expected of them.

"In this zoo we require only animals that are potentially violent — fierce animals. All the rest, I'm afraid, will have to go."

Spoilers ahead.

The zookeepers know this is ridiculous, after all what is meant by a fierce animal? The zoo shouldn't be about profit, it's about conservation and education. They will do whatever they can to save the zoo and argue a giraffe can be fierce if it hits you with its neck. The bug expert, Adrian 'Bugsy' Malone, explains that a tsetse fly is fierce in the damage it can cause. So they come up with a plan to make the cute animals seem dangerous. But Rollo sees right through their ridiculous attempts, including a dramatized anteater escape. He still demands that the non-fierce animals be removed. The zookeepers try another crazy plan — present the cutest ones to Rollo and tell him that he must rid the zoo of them by the only way possible, shooting them. They believe there is no way he could follow through on that and will see the error of his ways.

Eventually Rollo and the zookeepers realize they have the same goal. Saving the zoo.

But one man stands in the way. The corporate overlord of Marwood Zoo, Octopus Inc. owner Rod McCain. He sends his son and a recently hired, smart and savvy woman to oversee the zoo. Willa Weston sees making the zoo earn McCain's required 20 percent profit as her way up the corporate ladder. Vince McCain, the ne'er-do-well son, tells his father that he can help by bringing in sponsorships. He also has the hots for Willa, portrayed by the fierce Jamie Lee Curtis. Who can blame him?

Fierce Creatures stars John Cleese, Jamie Lee Curtis, Kevin Kline, and Michael Palin. Directed by Robert Young and Fred Schepisi.

Available for free on Dailymotion. Free with ads on YouTube. For $3.99 on Prime, Fandango at Home, Google Play and Apple TV.

To make requests and see the movie lists and schedules, go to WonkMovie.

This evening's cartoon is a Merrie Melodies short from 1942, Case Of The Missing Hare. Starring Bugs Bunny, produced by Leon Schlesinger and directed by Chuck Jones. From Warner Bros Studios.