Wonkette Top Ten Is Veering Off Topic, Needs Coffee

Good times!

Good morning!

How's tricks? You guys doing okay? Having a nice morning so far? Super! I honestly need to have some coffee so I can wow you all with very smart and thoughtful takes on things other than the Gossip Girl premiere, which I finally got around to watching last night. (People are pretty, clothes are glorious, very relieved to see the teens drinking martinis like proper fictional teenagers from the Upper East Side, but feeling like there are too many characters to keep track of! Also oh my God how is Tavi Gevinson their teacher? She looks like she could be playing a high schooler. Jeez. We are used to our 30-year-old AhnDRAYAs for heaven's sake. And honestly I am not sure how I feel about knowing who GG is right out the gate. Will have to wait and see.)

Anyway, here are Wonkette's Top Ten stories of the week. Enjoy!

10. The Federalist: We Wouldn't Need 'Subsidized Childcare' If You Bitches Would Just Stay Home — WELP! This is the only one from me this week. I thought it because I was hideous and unloved and my heart was broken but then I remembered I was out for many days.

9. That Time Trump Was Pretty Sure He Could Use COVID As Excuse To Cancel The Election. Allegedly! — Alas, he was wrong! From Evan!

8. Gather 'Round, People Are Talking Sh*t About Meghan McCain — And everyone likes to do that. From Evan!

7. Whew, Ada County Idaho Didn't Hire The Nazi To Be Sheriff — Dok brings you some good news about Ada County, Idaho

6. Trump Stiffs Rudy Giuliani For Legal Bills. Yeah, Don't Faint. — What? And he seemed like such a decent fella! From Liz

5. National Review's Lament: No One Will F*ck Trump Voters — Evergreen headline. From Dok

4. GETTR Grounded In Gutter. EGADS! — Who would have thought? From Liz

3. Oh Nothing, Just Tomi Lahren Calling Nice Flight Attendants 'Nazis Of The Air' — Remember when they were all so distressed that we were calling "just regular racists" Nazis? Because that was totally a thing. From Evan.

2. How Long Until New Fox Weather Channel Blames Hurricanes On Critical Race Theory? — Probably not very! From Evan

1. Michael Flynn's Family Didn't Take QAnon Oath, That's Just How They Say 'I Love You!' — Sure, why not! From Evan

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