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Wonkette Week In Review: All Your Favorites -- Or Somebody's, At Least -- In One Convenient Place!
Ah, the weekend. A chance to unwind, to sleep in, to catch up on the nicer things in life -- like the ten bestest Wonkette stories of the week, as determined by which stories were shared the most onĀ our Facebook pageĀ -- as everyone who readĀ The DaVinci CodeĀ knows, popularity is always the very best measure of quality. If you don't see one of your favorites here, you clearly need to click that "share" button more, and should probably alsoĀ give us moneyĀ -- we're corruptible (Wouldn't that be the saddest graft ever? Not that you shouldn't try it, though). In any case, here are your Top Ten Wonkies of the week past:
10: Bruce Springsteen and others played CCR's popular, iconic song "Fortunate Son" at a Veterans Day concert, and this wassomehow a huge slur on veterans,Ā at least according to conservatives who know how all veterans feel.
9: Glenn Beck's brain has problems,Ā only this time he says he actually has a diagnosis, maybe. Expect a huge announcement soon!
8: We said goodbye to Ebola.Ā E-what-a now? Sorry, doesn't ring a bell. Was that a band? Pfft. "Ebola."
7: Barack Obama announced he's in favor of Net Neutrality,Ā and called on the FCC to develop rules that will keep the Internet working exactly the way it always has. Suddenly, maintaining the Internet's status quo became a radical socialist plan to destroy freedom.
6: A Texas city voted to ban fracking,Ā and suddenly found out that "local control" is a threat to freedom, decency, and corporate profitability. Happily, the state government feels no need to comply with mere municipal laws.
5: As the first black Republican woman in Congress,Utah Senator-elect Mia LoveĀ is proud to have broken barriers. Just don't ask her if it's significant that she's the first black Republican woman in Congress, becauseĀ it's not about race.Ā
4: Christianist baby factory managers Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar wanted happily married people to post pictures of themselves kissing. OK, maybenotĀ allĀ happily-married people.Ā
3: Wewished Kurt Vonnegut a happy Armistice Day,Ā as one does. And a happy birthday, too. Hi-ho.
2: Rush Limbaugh is going to sue all the DemocratsĀ because they accurately quoted words about rape that came out of his mouth.
1: A little girl yelled at a street preacherĀ to please just shut up please, andĀ it was magic.Ā
Wonkette Week In Review: All Your Favorites -- Or Somebody's, At Least -- In One Convenient Place!
Only 10 months until the first Republican debates at the hallowed halls of the St. Ronald McDonald Library.
You left out the Banghazi, you liberal running dog puppets!