Wonkette's Weekly Top 10 Is Trolling Baby
You come read your top 10 stories right now!
Hello hello! This week, we began stuffing our 40 hours into a four-day on/three-day off schedule, like we are firepersons! What did you think? Could you tell? Or could you tell that we were even MORE AWESOME? Yeah, that's what I thought. Don't tell Evan and Robyn and Dok and SER but I am actually the only one working less, because of how I used to work 10-12 hours a day every weekday and half on weekends, and now I work the same as them! Haha suckers! Anyway, I'm still tired. TOP TEN BITCHES as chosen by a CREW OF TEAMSTERS SITTING AROUND ON BREAK.
10. President Grand Dragon Confesses To Criminal Negligence Before Practically Tens Of People . Fucking idiot.
9. Trump Nom Anthony Tata Pulled A Nuge, Forged Court Order, Is Be Best People . This was a good story, but I didn't think so many of you would read it because how could you even parse that headline, is it Tagalog?
8. Anti-LGBTQ Hate Group Kicked Off AmazonSmile, Will Have To Find New Way To Fund Bigotry . : (
7. Trump Campaign Idiot Brad Parscale Might Have To Find Cheaper Bed To Sh*t In Soon . Yeah, been some bedshitting goin' on.
6. We Read President Batsh*t McDumb's Wall Street Journal Interview So You Don't Have To . That was nice of us. Especially since a WSJ subscription is $36.99 a month. You can't afford that! You send all your $ to Wonkette!
5. Whistleblowers 'Bout To Burn Bill Barr's Sh*t DOWN, Y'all. A Liveblog! It was long.
4. 'Ex-Gay' Org Disbands A Year After Founder Comes Out As Currently Gay . That can't be right.
3. Watch Donald Trump Jr. Interview Daddy And Drink Every Time Junior Craves Daddy's Love: A Drinking Game! Oh no you are dead of drinks.
2. 'Fox & Friends': What Is The Trump Campaign, A IDIOT? Probably, I think this was on Monday, otherwise known as BECCA'S NOT HERE MAN.
1. This Is Your Official Thread For Mocking Trump's Tulsa Coronarally! Not afraid to be servicey!
And there you have your top 10 Wonkette posts this week, as chosen by a crew of Teamsters sitting around on break. Don't forget, the five of us on staff full-time and several part-time are supported ENTIRELY by YOU. If you're already donating, YOU ARE EXCUSED (to the comments). If you're not, well, why not go get your credit card and be part of the solution, you magnificent beast? Here, have a widget!
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Do you need a Joe Biden shirt or whatnot? Buy some shit at the Bazaar, my son is doing our merches now maybe and I promised I would pay him "money" if he came and brought our granddaughter to live with us safe from the ronas! No, the house needs MORE generations! QUICK, who's got a great great aunt?
OK you get baby pictures.
And lol look at my weirdo.
Keep the blood inside www.youtube.com
The end.
So here's what I want to know, Rebecca: After the phone call to customer service, DID THE PANCAKE EVER GET DELIVERED? DID THEY REMEMBER THE BLUEBERRIES?
These are the important follow up questions that must be answered.
My first pair I got 10 years wear out of them. Lots of wet and horse shit. The last two pair I got barely 2 years before soles disintegrated. They are the most comfortable boot I ever wore. I hope your new ones are as good!!