Your Weekly Top Ten Is A TODDLER DRIVING A WONKEBAGO

YOU COME READ YOUR TOP TEN STORIES RIGHT NOW!

Aug 24, 2019

That seems dangerous. Oh wait, just kidding, we have been informed that the toddler did not drive the Wonkebago. (OR DID SHE?) Nah. (UNLESS SHE DID.) Probably not.

Anyway.

Before we count down the top ten stories of the week, here is your obligatory money beg, because if you love Wonkette, we need you to SUPPORT WONKETTE. Give us money to keep the lights on up in here! Better yet? SUBSCRIBE MONTHLY! Or up your subscription! Thank you, we love you, you pay our rent.

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Ready to count down the top stories? Yes, you are.

Stories chosen as usual by Beyoncé:

10. Sarah Huckabee Sanders Hired By Father Of (Trump's) Lies

9. If Trump Is Really God's 'Chosen One,' God's A Dumbass

8. Log Cabin Republicans Endorse Trump, Because They Like Getting Punched In The Face

7. Ben Shapiro's Daily Wire Tries To Steal From Indie Artist, Lands In Dumpster Fire

6. Totally Real News Outlet 'Epoch Times' Loves Trump, Falun Gong, Heterosexual Healing, And Just Floating Right There Up In The Air

5. 'Veggie Tales' Creator Ain't Gonna Put No Godless Gay Green Beans On His Christian Vegetable Show

4. This Is Just A Very Good Video Of A Coyote Pup Getting Rescued By A Chicago Guy Who Swears A Lot

3. Who Put The Dumbass Greenland Idea In Trump's Head? This Dumbass Did.

2. House Democrats Just Wondering If Someone In Munch's Shop Messed With Trump's Tax Audit

1. Trump Is Fucking Gross, Episode #456,286,057