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Your Weekly Top Ten Is All HEY, SARAH PALIN, HEY!
Not Sarah Palin, not even one bit.
Oh hey, Wonkers! It's time for your weekly top ten post, where we tell you the top ten posts of the week and you catch up on what you haven't read and you read them again and then you SHARE THEM ALL ON FACESPACE RIGHT NOW. And this week we are like "WTF" because the top two stories for the week involve Sarah Palin. Is she even a thing anymore? Huh.
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YOU CANNOT EVEN RIGHT NOW
Shall we now count down the top 10 stories of the week, chosen as usual by Beyoncé, ALLEGEDLY? Yes we shall!
1. Sarah Palin is screaming "Hoohah!" because she thinks Marines yell "vagina!" at the sky when they're excited.
2. Sarah Palin and Ann Coulter are feeling SOOO BETRAYED by their love boyfriend, Donald Trump.
3. Hey, Democratic senators and Joe Biden, wanna grow a spine and save the Supreme Court? HERE IS HOW!
4. Look, we made you a hat. It is a nice hat! It says "HELL. NO." because Wonkette is ready for a fight with Donald Trump, and so are you. GO BUY ONE!
5. Badass union boss is like honey badger, he ain't give one shit about Trump's flying monkeys or death threats.
6. Oh look, it is Jake Tapper, ALSO being a badass and doing some honey badgering of his own, at Mike Pence.
7. Donald Trump doesn't want to fly around on any stinky brand new Air Force One. Why can't he ride on his gold-plated trash plane? NO FAIR!
8. Oh great, now we have to save the libraries from the Koch brothers.
9. Stephen Colbert has a message for Alex Jones, Wikileaks and Reddit trolls, and his message is FUCK OFF.
10. And finally, speaking of Alex Jones, his Infowars thingie has named Wonkette as a "fake news" website, and we, along with The Economist and The Washington Post, are so very ashamed.
So there you go. Those are your top ten most clicked upon stories. They are very good stories!
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OK that's all, bye now, see you Monday, we'll see your mom on Monday, that's what she said, we don't know what any of what we typed just now even means, BYE.
Love,
Wonket