Your Weekly Top Ten Is Taking Bets On How Long It Takes Roger Stone To Flip On Trump
YOU COME READ YOUR TOP TEN STORIES RIGHT NOW!
What a year we had yesterday! We're going to get right to it because ZZZZZZ, but here's a fun article for you to read from Gabe Sherman about how Roger Stone, who swears he'd never flip on Trump, will probably flip by next Tuesday, because people like that aren't actually loyal, just like Trump isn't loyal.
By the way, the picture above is of Wonkette Toddler Donna working in the Wonkette Ivanka Trump Sweatshop, yes that's right, when you buy merchandise from Wonkette, you can rest assured that Donna MADE IT with, um, that screwdriver.
Just kidding, Wonkette is not a real sweatshop doer like Ivanka Trump.
Shall we count down the top ten stories of the week? We shall.
Stories chosen as usual by Beyoncé:
10. A 2020 Democratic Primary Primer, For Kids!
9. Look Out, Chuck 'N' Nancy, President WALL Made A SPEECH
8. Forget Trump. Let's Have Some NICE THINGS.
7. Michael Cohen's So Excited! He's So Excited! He's So ... SCARED!
6. Trump Idiots 'Debunk' Michael Cohen Story By Shrieking HAW HAW BUZZFEED SUX!
5. Pelosi To Trump: Get Fucked, Orange Loser
4. Relax, Everyone: Donald Trump Is Still A Fucking Criminal
3. This Is The Future Republicans Want: MAGA Brats Mock Native American Drummer, Just To Be Assholes.
1. Lara Trump To Furloughed Workers: Drop Dead
There you go! Those are good stories!
Let's see, anything else?
Nope.
GOODBYE.
Love,
Wonkette
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" ...hope they die lonely and alone."
Since in essence we all die alone, may I add to 'lonely and alone',,, in pain, on the cold floor of a dark room that is filled with loud rap, and smells like vomit.
Hi! We don't do "some horrible person in the news might get raped in prison, and that's just great and hilarious, hurr hurr" here. Because it's rape. And if you think the prospect of someone being raped is hilarious or a fine idea, you may want to rethink your assumptions on that point.
Please review the rules.
-- Dok Zoom, Yr Friendly Neighborhood Comments Moderator