Paul Ryan Just Waiting Patiently For His Not-Trump Prince To Come Rescue GOP

The 2016 deja vu has been overwhelming lately. Republican National Committee Chair Ronna McDaniel is already pushing another "loyalty pledge" designed solely to keep sore loser in chief Donald Trump from running third party if he doesn't win the nomination. However, Trump breaks contracts that are actually enforceable. All the loyalty pledge will achieve is anchoring "normal" Republicans to Trump when he inevitably wins the nomination — just like in 2016 when a Trump primary victory at least seemed far-fetched.

Former House Speaker Paul Ryan currently exists in a state of denial about the 2024 primary outcome, just like in 2016 when he dragged his feet about endorsing Trump before finally embracing his full grossness. He insists Trump won't be the nominee because Republicans "want to win" in 2024, but polling clearly shows that primary voters are back on the Trump train.

A new Emerson poll has Trump with a humiliating 30-point lead over Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis. He's ahead of DeSantis by 15 points in both an Echelon Insights and a Fox News poll. DeSantis led Trump by four points in a Yahoo News/YouGov poll poll at the start of February but now Trump is ahead eight points.

We don't predict the future here, but beating Trump will require doing more than just wishing he'll go away. That's been tried.


Ex-Speaker Paul Ryan Thinks Republicans Will STOP THE INSANITY. How's That Working Out For Him?

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Ryan's home state of Wisconsin is the scheduled location for the 2024 Republican National Convention, and when a local reporter asked Ryan if he planned to attend, his response was absolutely pathetic.

“It depends on who the nominee is,” he said. (It's going to be Trump.) “I’ll be here if it’s somebody not named Trump." (It's going to be Trump.) "We lost with him in ‘18, ’20, and ’22." (That's true. It's still gonna be Trump.) "We know this. He will cost us another election, so I’m just excited about somebody not named Trump.”

(The Emerson poll, unfortunately, shows Trump four points ahead of Joe Biden, while DeSantis trails the president by four points.)

Although "Somebody Not Named Trump" sounds like a compelling candidate whose rallies are sure to fill stadiums nationwide, most potential Republican candidates are polling in single digits against Trump. They are likely struggling because they have actual names.

Ryan is adamant that he won’t attend the RNC if Trump is the nominee. "No, I'm not interested in participating in that, no," Ryan said. "Even in Wisconsin."

Ryan won't be the first "normal" Republican who refused to attend a Trump coronation while still carrying his robes. Former nominees Mitt Romney and John McCain skipped the 2016 convention, as did former worst president ever George W. Bush. Then Sen. Ben Sasse also noped out with his usual classic Nebraska snark: "Sen. [Ben] Sasse will not be attending the convention and will instead take his kids to watch some dumpster fires across the state, all of which enjoy more popularity than the current front-runners."

LOL! What a card. Anyway, Sasse has since left the Senate. We won't suggest MAGA chased him out or anything. He probably just got tired wasting his best one liners in Congress. He's now the University of Florida's president. Maybe he'll put up enough flags in his office to convince him he's in the Oval Office.

Former Vice President Mike Pence is also a big supporter of “Somebody Not Named Trump.” He told NBC’s Ali Vitali in an interview that aired Friday, “I think the times call for different leadership. … I’m confident we’ll have better choices than my old running mate.”

Will we, though? Trump is awful but his potential competitors aren't much better.

"There are great people running," a desperate Ryan insisted last week. So far only Nikki Haley has officially declared her candidacy. She is definitely a ... person running.

"I know them all," he continued. "They're all pretty decent friends of mine, and so I think any one of these candidates that are thinking about getting in the race if they get in the race, would be a great candidate. I think we're going to beat Joe Biden if we don't run Donald Trump."

But'cha are gonna run Trump, Paul. You are!

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


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