Pillow Man Hires Private Eyes To Solve Mystery Of Why He's Not On Fox News Anymore

Although Mike Lindell is supposed to be launching his super amazing social media site that is going to be even bigger than all of the other social media sites on April 19th, he still has time to visit his friend Steve Bannon about once a week to complain about how no one else will let him go on their shows to talk about how Donald Trump actually won the election and Joe Biden stole it from him with the help of Dominion voting machines (pronounced, in Lindell-ese, dough-MIN-ion).

As has been widely reported, Dominion voting systems is currently suing Fox News for over a billion dollars for having had people on there claiming that they rigged the election for Joe Biden. Thus, they probably think it is a bad idea to have Mike Lindell on to talk about how Dominion rigged the election for Joe Biden. They also canceled Lou Dobbs' show, likely for the same reason.

And I will tell you, as grotesque as these election lies are, I actually have some reticence about these kinds of lawsuits because they can also be leveraged against legitimate news sources by bad corporations, which then creates an atmosphere where news sources without the deep pockets to fight these battles in court may not pursue important stories for fear of being sued, and that's not great for journalism. But regardless of how anyone feels about this lawsuit, it is happening, and that is obviously why Fox isn't having Mike Lindell on every other day. Because they don't want to be sued more than they are already being sued.

But that is not an answer Mike Lindell is willing to accept. He's convinced it goes much deeper, somehow, and told Steve Bannon in an interview Friday on Bannon's "War Room: Pandemic" show that he has even gone so far as to hire "private investigators" to find out why Fox won't have him on.

In a discussion about how the Murdochs are "tough hombres" but not as purely committed to the conservative cause as Roger Ailes was, Bannon asked Lindell about why he wasn't on Fox so much these days.

Why are the Murdochs — and correct me if I'm wrong, I think you're one of the biggest advertisers on there — I don't remember seeing you on Fox recently. Why are the Murdochs afraid of Dominion? Is there something about their case? Is there something about the facts? I mean the Murdochs are tough, they don't care. So why is Mike Lindell not on Fox and why do they seem to say, hey, when Dominion says something, we're just gonna shut up about it and talk about Biden's tax bill?

So weird to talk about actual news instead of the libelous pipe dreams of a pillow salesman.

Again, it seems relatively obvious why the Murdochs are "afraid" of Dominion. They are already being sued, they don't want to be sued for more money, and they don't think it's worth it to be sued for more money just to give Mike Lindell a platform for his bullshit. Because they're capitalists and their goal is to make more money for themselves, not lose it because the Pillow Guy wants to go on the air and tell lies that he thinks will somehow lead to Donald Trump being president again.

Lindell, however, is still waiting for those answers.

You know, I'm gonna have those answers soon, 'cause I've hired private investigators and I've spent a lot of money on them to investigate everything. Why are there bots and trolls, who's behind them? Why is Facebook involved, Wikipedia involved? And then the big question: why isn't Fox having people on? Why isn't Fox on there talking about Dominion and Smartmatic and the election fraud?

Bannon then asked an actual good question — "What if their response is 'Hey Mike, we saw the films, we've seen it, and we just don't think you've got the evidence?' [...] Could that be a response?"

"100 percent no," Lindell said, and then complained about how none of the mainstream media will have him on, even though he is willing to go on all of the mainstream media, even CNN, and none of them are interested. It's almost as if no one believes him, which would just be crazy. So it can't be that. Clearly, he's gotta get some private eyes involved to find out what is really going on.

It's not a bad idea. I may hire some investigators myself to find out why I do not have my own TV show and line of glamour capes. Also to find out why Jeff Goldblum is not my boyfriend. It would all be an obvious waste of money because it would be super weird of me to feel entitled to any of those things and also Jeff Goldblum is already married, but hey! Why not? If we're all hiring investigators to find out why we don't get to do all of the things we want when there are already extremely obvious reasons for why we don't have them, might as well.

In other news, Mike Lindell's website is supposed to launch on April 19th — and although Bannon and Lindell said we can all go ahead and sign up now, ahead of time, to beat the rush, that does not appear to be the case.


[Steve Bannon War Room]

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Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse


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