Plan B Ushers In New Era of Immorality, Hot Sex
Just as we all feared, sales of Plan B -- the so-called "morning after pill" -- have skyrocketed since the drug was made available to any Tom, Dick, and Harlot who can manage to close her legs long enough to drag herself to the pharmacy and cough up $50 to escape responsibility for her disgusting actions. Plan B was a $40 million/year concern until the FDA betrayed us all, and now Barr Pharmaceuticals is on track to make twice that off the backs of the ignorant and slutty in 2007.
"This is exactly what we hoped would happen," said Susan F. Wood of the George Washington University School of Public Health, smiling lasciviously and gliding her fingers across and wine glass. As assistant commissioner for women's health and director of the Office of Women's Health at the FDA, Wood is responsible for your daughter losing her innocence.
While the morning after pill, when used correctly, prevents fertilization completely -- or at worst, implementation of a blastocyst -- it still counts as baby-killing and all of you are going to hell, where you'll be taunted by billions of wailing unsaved cell masses in little embryonic swaddling clothes.