Please Tell Us What Is Going On With These Creepy DIY Videos
Hello, and welcome to your Saturday open thread! This week, I bring you the most confusing video series in all of existence, from a mysterious YouTube account called Troom Troom. I found them about a month or so ago, and have been deeply obsessed with them ever since. And now you will be, too! You are welcome.
So, basically all of the Troom Troom videos feature a bunch of young women with nicknames like "The Blue Eyed Girl," "Curly Sue" and "Dolly," whom I worry are being held captive in some weirdo's underground bunker, and an oddly sadistic-yet-perky narrator. The videos usually fall into one of three categories:
1) Unnecessarily Complicated DIY Tricks For Disguising Food As School Supplies
WHY? In what world would it be more normal to stick an X-acto knife in your mouth than to eat something in class? Why would you spend several hours making a small Jell-o cup when they literally sell them at the store? Why do they think that's how one makes lemonade? What kind of life is someone living where any of this is necessary or even possible?
2) Creepy Sadistic Pranks That Will Probably Get You Arrested
It is generally not OK to tie someone to a bed without their consent.
3) Instructions For Making Very Large And Very Small Versions Of Food Products
I don't... I just don't understand why anyone would want this?
And if you think those are strange... there is also one for Unicorns and Grannies who want to play pranks on each other, for some reason.
These videos are bizarre, and yet they are mesmerizing. I can't stop watching them, and I feel somewhat guilty about that because what if those poor girls are being held captive somewhere and I'm just sitting here being all "Why do these people have so many art supplies in summer school?" Still, I have so many, many questions. What country is this being filmed in? Is this some kind of Russian troll thing? How are the production values so high? Is it... someone's fetish? WHY IS ANY OF THIS HAPPENING?
Several media outlets have attempted to investigate, but to no avail. No one knows why this exists. It is a mystery.
I invite you to ponder all of this, and more, in your open thread! And also to tip us!
Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. In addition to her work at Wonkette, she also has a biweekly column at Dame. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse