Please Tell Us What Is Going On With These Creepy DIY Videos

Troom Troom

Hello, and welcome to your Saturday open thread! This week, I bring you the most confusing video series in all of existence, from a mysterious YouTube account called Troom Troom. I found them about a month or so ago, and have been deeply obsessed with them ever since. And now you will be, too! You are welcome.

So, basically all of the Troom Troom videos feature a bunch of young women with nicknames like "The Blue Eyed Girl," "Curly Sue" and "Dolly," whom I worry are being held captive in some weirdo's underground bunker, and an oddly sadistic-yet-perky narrator. The videos usually fall into one of three categories:

1) Unnecessarily Complicated DIY Tricks For Disguising Food As School Supplies

WHY? In what world would it be more normal to stick an X-acto knife in your mouth than to eat something in class? Why would you spend several hours making a small Jell-o cup when they literally sell them at the store? Why do they think that's how one makes lemonade? What kind of life is someone living where any of this is necessary or even possible?

2) Creepy Sadistic Pranks That Will Probably Get You Arrested

It is generally not OK to tie someone to a bed without their consent.

3) Instructions For Making Very Large And Very Small Versions Of Food Products

I don't... I just don't understand why anyone would want this?

And if you think those are strange... there is also one for Unicorns and Grannies who want to play pranks on each other, for some reason.

These videos are bizarre, and yet they are mesmerizing. I can't stop watching them, and I feel somewhat guilty about that because what if those poor girls are being held captive somewhere and I'm just sitting here being all "Why do these people have so many art supplies in summer school?" Still, I have so many, many questions. What country is this being filmed in? Is this some kind of Russian troll thing? How are the production values so high? Is it... someone's fetish? WHY IS ANY OF THIS HAPPENING?

Several media outlets have attempted to investigate, but to no avail. No one knows why this exists. It is a mystery.

I invite you to ponder all of this, and more, in your open thread! And also to tip us!

Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse

Donate with CC

Earlier this week, the Ecuadorian embassy in the UK told Julian Assange that it would evict him if he didn't stop being a slob and start taking care of his cat. Assange responded today by announcing he is taking legal action and claiming Ecuador violated his human rights by making him do his own laundry and pay rent. (He is reminding us of THIS awesome dude, who sued his parents for refusing to live anymore with a dude as awesome as he.) Pretty soon they're going to tell him to do things like "get a job" and "move out." GAWD, parents and embassies offering asylum to scumbag freeloaders are just the worst!

Keep reading... Show less
Donate with CC

The bat signal has gone out in Trumpland, and the vampires are obediently flying in formation. This Khashoggi murder story isn't going away, but here in US Amurika we got bombs to sell. So the GOP Brain Trust called an emergency meeting and came up with A PLAN. What if Jamal Khashoggi was a terrorist who deserved to be beaten, dismembered with a bone saw, and have his body repatriated to Saudi Arabia in pieces distributed among his killers' luggage? Can Republicans really have sunk that far?

YES, THEY CAN. The Washington Post reports,

In recent days, a cadre of conservative House Republicans allied with Trump has been privately exchanging articles from right-wing outlets that fuel suspicion of Khashoggi, highlighting his association with the Muslim Brotherhood in his youth and raising conspiratorial questions about his work decades ago as an embedded reporter covering Osama bin Laden, according to four GOP officials involved in the discussions who were not authorized to speak publicly.

Those aspersions — which many lawmakers have been wary of stating publicly because of the political risks of doing so — have begun to flare into public view as conservative media outlets have amplified the claims, which are aimed in part at protecting Trump as he works to preserve the U.S.-Saudi relationship and avoid confronting the Saudis on human rights.

Wow, that's pretty fuckin' evil, even by the debased standards of today's GOP! But if that's what it takes to protect Trump and Kush, Fox is here to oblige. Here's Harris Faulkner on the curvy couch wondering if maybe Jared Kushner's BFF Mohammed bin Bonesaw even has time to order the murder of a dissident reporter since, "He's dealing with a whole host of other issues over there." He's probably too busy, like, washing his manly beard to murder people outside Saudi Arabia, right?

Keep reading... Show less
Donate with CC

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc