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Pope Yells at Nuns For Acting Too Much Like Jesus, Not Enough Like Pope

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Nothing but top-notch poping from your Nazi Pope.


Nazi Pope Joseph Ratzinger is so proud of his image as the CEO of a lucrative club for child rapists who runs around modeling Prada shoes and phallic hats that he is going to celebrate, by scolding some nuns for failing to be enough like the Pope. He ordered one of his henchmen to sneak up on a group of American nuns visiting the Vatican this week and give them a letter informing them generally of their neglect for their fundamental Catholic duty to worry feverishly about other people's genitalia while also ridiculing them specifically for their work advocating for social justice and tending to the poor and sick. Think we're exaggerating even the tiniest bit? Take bets now! (Just kidding. Don't, because that would be foolish.)

From the New York Times:

The Vatican’s assessment, issued on Wednesday, said that members of the group, the Leadership Conference of Women Religious, had challenged church teaching on homosexuality and the male-only priesthood, and promoted “radical feminist themes incompatible with the Catholic faith.”

...

Word of the Vatican’s action took the group completely by surprise, Sister Sanders said. She said that the group’s leaders were in Rome on Wednesday for what they thought was a routine annual visit to the Vatican when they were informed of the outcome of the investigation, which began in 2008.

“I’m stunned,” said Sister Simone Campbell, executive director of Network, a Catholic social justice lobby founded by sisters. Her group was also cited in the Vatican document, along with the Leadership Conference, for focusing its work too much on poverty and economic injustice, while keeping “silent” on abortion and same-sex marriage.

Ha ha, the Pope is just Rick Santorum in a moldy toad costume. [NYTimes; thanks to Wonkette operative "Sinpelo"]

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ProPublica released a recording yesterday of children in a Customs and Border Protection (CBP) detention facility crying for their parents after being subjected to the tender mercies of the New Cruelty.

The children are distraught, sobbing, inconsolable (not that the Border Patrol agents seem especially interested in consoling them). As ProPublica notes, "They scream 'Mami' and 'Papá' over and over again, as if those are the only words they know." You do not want to listen. But maybe you must.


One Border Patrol agent makes a very amusing joke as he hears all the children crying: "Well, we have an orchestra here [...] What's missing is a conductor."

Can anyone doubt that SS guards made similar jokes as children were unloaded from boxcars?

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Mark Sanford is all mopey because he just lost his cushy Congress job after Donald Trump said mean things about him on Twitter. This was not the expected ending of a distinguished career, which involved lying to his constituents as governor about his whereabouts because he was conducting a clandestine affair.

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