Preparing for Scott McClellan's Second Career

Things got a little repetitive in the WH briefing room yesterday, as Scott McClellan lost track of where the questions stopped and the stonewalling began:

Q Has Karl Rove offered to resign, in view of his problems?

MR. McCLELLAN: Again, you keep asking these questions that are related to an ongoing investigation --

Q Does he still have his security clearance?

MR. McCLELLAN: -- and those are questions that have already been addressed.

Q No, they -- I've never heard this before. Have you?

It's all getting awfully familiar and it's starting to bother Wonkette's own Fred Becker:
My Incandescent Wonkfire,


It occurs to me that Scott has an opportunity. Each day he protects Karl and refuses to answer obvious questions from the Washington press corps, his earning power diminishes. At least Mike McCurry increased his speaking fees -- he was lying for the President. Defending someone the President nicknames Turd Blossom isn't as profitable, though he may be in demand for the annual mulch farmers' retreat.

Continued after the jump.

If the world were fair, Scott would barter Karl’s pink porcine posterior in trade for something useful. Karl could:


Wash Scott’s car for a week.

Keep track of his Cosi and Starbucks frequent purchaser cards.

Write weekly thank you note to Fred Barnes for naughty playthings set.

  Orchestrate invasion of third rate country to clear space for vacation spot or McClellan love nest.


So maybe your readers could offer some of their own ideas because Scott surely deserves something for a career destined to be withered into an arid stalk. No reason to leave him shaking a dead geranium for the rest of his life.


Until I find a better way to spend August I remain,

 All tangled up in my iPod headphones,


July 27, 2005 Press Briefing by Scott McClellan []


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