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Weather looks fine to us.


This ... does not even make sense:

“May as well … announce this. I’m not going to get into details because of the security nature of things, but it turns out that we will not be able to do the program here tomorrow,” [Rush] Limbaugh said Thursday. “We’ll be on the air next week, folks, from parts unknown.”

Limbaugh said the show will be back on the air Monday, but to be on the air Friday would be “legally impossible” for them do to the show out of South Florida.

He said it would just be "problematic" for him to go on the air Friday, and also that he was totally planning to go to the movies but that's "blown to smithereens" now, which just sucks.

But why though? Why is Rush Limbaugh going to "parts unknown," where there may or may not be a swimming pool full of prescription pills? Is there something going on in South Florida right now?

We do remember Limbaugh earlier this week talking about some alleged "storm" called "Hurricane Irma," that Al Gore and the Illuminati and its front companies "Aquafina" and "Duracell" have been lying about, that is supposedly going to hit South Florida this weekend, where Limbaugh lives. He said "the system" is #rigged, and that liberal commie-sexuals like Florida GOP Governor Rick Scott are in cahoots with Big Weather Channel and that it's just one big scam to make people buy too much bottled water and batteries, which is stupid because man-made climate change is fake and Al Gore is fat.

????

We are extremely for confuse. Is Rush Limbaugh a hypocrite? Or is he a pussy scared of some alleged #FalseFlag storm? OR IS HE BOTH?

Goddammit. We bet Rush is on his private aero-plane right now going to "parts unknown," viciously gulping down bottled water and stuffing extra batteries in his vibrator, like a common sheeple. WHO GOT TO HIM?

This just goes to show that even patriotic conservatives like Rush Limbaugh aren't safe from George Soros Susan Rice unmasking Vince Foster globalists Bilderberg fake news greedy "scientists" with their so-called "science" Benghazi CONSPIRACY!!!!!!11!

Speaking of cocks who are scared of common hurricanes, here is an adorable picture of a bunch of cocks wrapped in burritos evacuating the storm, because if the cocks aren't burritoed they will fight with each other.

Did they have to wrap Rush Limbaugh up in a burrito for his own evacuation safety too? Magic 8 Ball says "where they get a sheet that big?" because Magic 8 Ball is kind of a dick.

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[Think Progress]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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