I don't know why we gave you dead faith-healed children, and then dead decapitated children, and then that asshole Garbage Man, Garbage Garbage, all in a row. But I do know that not even Scott Brown poking his wife in her bottom on his Senate desk was not enough to pull your pill bottles and your meat cleavers and your garrotes and however else you regularly off yourselves out of your big, sexy, frankly mesmerizing hands.


So let's do this, instead of killing ourselves. It's a video of people hugging backstage at the DNC, and it features Hillz and Bill and Bamz and Joe and Meryl Streep and all the fabulous celebrities!

HUGGING IS NICE, FOR NICE PEOPLE! HOORAY!

Also, here is me bigfooting Evan and bogarting this ADORABLE BABY ZEBRA all for myself!

OLLIE OLLIE OXENFREE, YOU CAN ALL COME OUT FROM WORKING ON YOUR TRUCKS, AND YOUR SUICIDES, AND ALL THE OTHER PLACES YOU WERE GOING, WE LOVE YOU!

Okay bye.

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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