Rand Paul Still Trying To Fire Dr. Fauci, Because What The F*ck Is Wrong With These People

Rand Paul Still Trying To Fire Dr. Fauci, Because What The F*ck Is Wrong With These People

It’s been two years since COVID-19 shut down the nation before going on to kill almost one million Americans. This is rightly a time for somber reflection, but if you’re a preening jackass like Senator Rand Paul, it’s also the perfect opportunity for another attention-grabbing stunt.

Paul isn’t a complete monster, though. He mourns the lives lost to the virus, but he also mourns “those we lost to the crushing and overbearing lockdowns and mandates that were based on junk science.” Yes, people experienced legitimate personal sacrifice during the lockdowns, but equating that in the same breath with those who literally stopped breathing is grotesque. Keep in mind that Paul protested giving struggling people “free money” while politicians with human souls (i.e., Democrats) tried to pass pandemic relief measures.

PREVIOUSLY: Dr. Fauci Goes Rand Paul's Neighbor In Senate Hearing

The senator from Kentucky has a one-track mind without a working engine, so it’s no surprise that he chose this occasion to pursue his petty vendetta against Dr. Anthony Fauci. Paul plans to introduce yet another of his useless amendments, but this one will make the "Fire Fauci" hashtag a reality.


Paul writes for Fox News:

To ensure that ineffective, unscientific lockdowns and mandates are never foisted on the American people ever again, I will introduce an amendment to eliminate Dr. Anthony Fauci’s position as director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases and divide his power into three separate new institutes.

This is reactive governance in action. Paul has a personal issue with Dr. Fauci and is working it out on the whole country. We should replace Paul in his upcoming election, but it wouldn’t make sense to divide his Senate duties among three separate trained chimps with better haircuts. That’s an insult to the chimps.

Each of these three institutes will be led by a director who is appointed by the president and confirmed by the Senate for a five-year term. This will create accountability and oversight into a taxpayer-funded position that has largely abused its power and has been responsible for many failures and misinformation during the COVID-19 pandemic.

This won’t create “accountability and oversight.” It will turn Dr. Fauci’s current position into overtly partisan roles. Despite rightwing cries of “faucism,” Dr. Fauci didn’t directly order any of the lockdowns or mandates that Paul resents so much. Donald Trump, after much kicking and screaming, issued social distancing guidelines in March 2020, and governors declared states of emergency so they could enact their own mitigation measures. Dr. Fauci and Dr. Deborah Birx showed Trump the data and then presumably a clarifying photo of a camel on a ventilator. Trump reportedly "shook his head and said, 'I guess we got to do it.’”

Dr. Fauci never made anyone do anything. He is not and never was what Paul grossly calls a health “dictator in chief.”

PREVIOUSLY: Rand Paul Flogs Fever Dreams About Fauci Creating COVID

But Paul is insistent on scapegoating Dr. Fauci for the choices and actions of Democratic and Republican politicians.

No one person should have the sole authority to dictate science, especially when that one person wasn’t ever following the science. I’ve said that from the beginning, and I’ve been proven right over, and over, and over again. On masks, lockdowns, schools, natural immunity, all of it.

Dr. Fauci was never the "sole authority" or a single individual dictating science. Dr. Birx was the White House COVID-19 response coordinator. She was in the same meetings. Dr. Fauci holds a position of respect but it’s not dependent on his job. He’s respected because he’s an expert in his field and not a smug hack like Paul.

PREVIOUSLY: Rand Paul: Petty Researchers Won't Study Horse Paste Just To Spite Trump

Dr. Fauci is 81 years old but even someone half his age could reasonably claim they are too old for this shit. Partisan vultures like Rand Paul and Florida Governor Ron DeSantis have tried to make their bones by demonizing a public health official who has done more good during his career than they could ever imagine, let alone achieve. Dr. Fauci can peacefully retire knowing that he did his best to keep people alive during a pandemic. Rand Paul will never succeed in dragging Dr. Fauci down to his level, but unfortunately, he’ll never stop trying.

[Fox News / CNN]

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


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