RBG Went To Work Yesterday, But That Won't Convince The Geniuses Who Think She Is Dead
Ever since Ruth Bader Ginsburg successfully underwent surgery for lung cancer, conservative sites and message boards have been trafficking in a ridiculous theory that she is actually dead and that there is some kind of Weekend at Bernie's-esque conspiracy to pretend she is still alive.
Now, one would think that her recent public appearance at a concert held in her honor would have put this to rest. Alas, it did not. Rather, the "researchers" (as they hilariously call themselves) determined that the concert was actually her funeral.
No. Really. That was a thing.
I admit that I gave this a lot more thought than I should have. Like, how did they think this would go? How long did they imagine this would go on for? Why would they risk having a full on funeral concert, open to the press? Wouldn't they just have not bothered to have a funeral at all? And what did these people think was going to happen when it was announced that she died for real? Or did they think that we were going to pretend that she is immortal and thus never announce her death? It's so confusing!
Being very up to date on the "RBG is secretly dead!" nonsense, I was very curious about which way the "anons" would go with this when they announced her return to work on Friday. They did not disappoint!
On the one hand, we had one of my favorite QAnon loons, Praying Medic, claiming that no one ever actually believed RBG was dead, certainly not Q, and worrying that mean mainstream media people were going to use that to discredit Q, as if that is even necessary.
Another "researcher" suggested that perhaps the real scandal here is that Big Pharma used the secret cancer cure they have been keeping from the public on Ginsburg -- which makes total sense, as surely they would want to keep a liberal judge on the bench.
On the other hand, there were a whole lot of people -- including former White House advisor Sebastian Gorka -- still trying to hold on to the theory.
An unusual number of these people cannot figure out how to type SCOTUS. Given that these are the same group of people who think all of Donald Trump's typos are secret messages to them, we can assume that this is some kind of complex code we are too stupid to figure out.
This lady, who has a very unfortunate eye shadow situation going on and really should not be driving and recording a YouTube video at the same time, says she is willing to accept that RBG is alive, but only if she is offered proof of life.
Breaking Update: RBG Ruth Bader Ginsburg Seen ALIVE At Supreme Court Friday Closed Door Meetings www.youtube.com
And for their next trick, possibly, they'll play all of her dissents backwards and totally prove that this has been the plan all along. Or something! Are there any pictures of her on Abby Road? The public has a right to know!
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Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse