* It's not her fault, there's really no predicting what you'll say after you get hit with a tazer. ZAP! "I'm Rick James bitch!" [Shreveport Times]

* When Bill O'Reilly says, "There Is No Attack On Easter," what he means is, "So now we can do it like bunny rabbits!" [Think Progress]

* If not wearing a flag lapel pin makes you question John McCain's patriotism, just ask him to give you a high-five. [Princess Sparkle Pony]