- Journalism jumped the shark (again!) when our ex-godmother Gawker posted a mean thing about our beloved sybil Christine O'Donnell -- despite holding back the juiciest details.
- Coincidentally(?), Christine also developed a taste for human flesh.
- Top-secret plans confirm that a gulag of communists (Sheryl Crow) will descend upon DC to slander Glenn Beck.
- Alaska's Joe Miller cannot answer a simple question without running away like a common Frenchman.
- America's most worthless class of humans, graduate students, continue to delay adulthood, forever, because they will never be employed.
- David Vitter finally wiped his bottom clean of his nasty hooker sins -- before soiling himself once again.