Remembering Our Fallen Week: Shake It To Make It Work
- Newsboy Jim Lehrer retired his abacus and messenger pigeons for a newfangled iPhone.
- CNN anchor Rick Sanchez invented the hottest new Internet meme since LOLCats and TruckNutz combined: Jews secretly control the media! Why has no one thought of this before?
- Tai “Butterstick” Shan, America’s stolen panda, is so beloved by white people that his poop is so awesome and fragrant it is basically this year's Furby.
- Your Wonkette played To Catch a Predator with Mark Foley’s Twitter.
- Meg Whitman’s million dollar smile lit up our hearts.
- America’s favorite fucker (because he says “fuck” a lot), Rahm Emanuel, FINALLY left the White House to pursue his lifelong dream of becoming a Chicago slumlord.