Rep. Trent Franks Only Sounds Like A Nazi Because He's '100 percent Unapologetically Pro-life'


Look, just because Rep. Trent Franks happened to espouse the exact same medical mythology propounded by the Nazis (and Todd Akin) -- that women who are raped don't get pregnant because of trauma and magic ladyparts and stuff -- doesn't mean you shouldnt't give him lots of monies.

Since Rep. Trent Franks (R-Ariz.) claimed earlier this week that it's incredibly rare for women to become pregnant from rape, he has been under fire from women's rights groups, Democrats and even some members of his own party. Instead of running from his remarks, however, he's attempting to cash in and raise money out of the controversy.

"NARAL, Planned Parenthood and the taxpayer-funded abortion lobby is attacking me for one reason -- I'm 100 percent unapologetically pro-life and I won't back down," he wrote in an email to supporters on Thursday, according to the Arizona Republic. "Will you contribute $25, $50, $100, or even $500 right now to help me fight back?"

Suuuuuuure, that's the ticket, Trent. Those crazy womens are all up in unshaved arms because you are "pro-life." Not because you are "a dick" and "medically inaccurate" and also "spouting actual Nazi talk" on the floor of the House. And besides, all those librul haters are just taking you out of context, right? Haters like these guys:

Massachusetts GOP Senate candidate Gabriel Gomez called Franks a "moron." Rep. Charlie Dent (R-Pa.) said the fact that an all-male House Judiciary Committee panel voted to advance Franks' anti-abortion bill was a show of "staggering" "stupidity."

Well, screw those guys. You just keep Nazisplaining how rape works, Trent, and how pregnancy works and out-of-context argle bargle please send monies. Because they are all wrong, and you, Trent, are right, and nothing -- nothing! -- proves just how unapologetically 100 percent "pro-life" you are like relying on Nazi "research" to make your point.


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If you are ever in Lexington, Virginia and are looking for a nice, farm-to-table restaurant with a quality clientele, look no further than The Red Hen! Last night, Sarah Huckabee Sanders and her family went to go eat there, and found that she was not exactly not welcome.

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OK everyone, hello! It was a really shitty week with Trump's BABY JAILS and whatnot, right? And we cried and we cried, but then we got MAD. Are you MAD BRO? Because this shit is not going to stand and we are more fired up than ever to make things better, to register people to vote, to pick them up in our car so they can go vote, and also all the other stuff too. BRB TAKING OUR COUNTRY BACK NOW. That is how we are right now! So are you! Start by marching with Wonkette next week!

Also, please look above, as that is a picture of Wonkette toddler getting SWIMMING LESSONS. Isn't that the greatest?

OK, we are continuing our tradition of making the top ten post even shorter than ever before, because gotta get on the road and go to Nashville BRB GOING TO NASHVILLE NOW.

Stories chosen by Beyoncé, as per usual:

1. Why Are You Peeing On Yourself, Donald Trump, Jr.? (ALLEGEDLY)

2. Ann Coulter's America Will Die if Baby Jails Go Away, So That's Something!

3. Yes, Trump Is Stealing Children. But You Can DO Something.

4. Baby Jails? Goddamn Motherfucking BABY JAILS?

5. Trump's 500 Days Of Bummer

6. The 987,386 Most Fucked Up Lies Our Shithead President Told This Morning

7. Happy Father's Day, Roger Stone! YOU ARE THE COLLUSION!

8. Michael Cohen Slams Baby Jails On His Way To Grownup Jail

9. Awwwww Rudy Giuliani, YOU FUCKING SCARED?

10. Trump Foundation Fuckery? WHO KNEW!

So there you go. Those are your top ten most clicked upon stories, according to Beyoncé. They are very good stories!

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