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Republican Missouri State Rep. Caught Banging 14-Year-Old

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"JEFFERSON CITY -- Missouri state Rep. Scott Muschany, R-Frontenac, was indicted today in connection with a reported sexual assault of a 14-year-old girl on May 17, the day after this year’s Legislative session ended." What, were all the 14-year-oldboys already taken by the other celebrating Republican legislators?


According to the 14-year-old girl's brother, their mother -- a state employee -- has been fucking Muschany for a couple of years now. In other words, Muschany was working an old college trick: get with the fug roommate and then move on to the hot roommate. Although in this case the fug roommate is an adult woman, and the hot roommate is the adult woman's 14-year-old daughter, so this is, what's the word, awful rape induced by alcohol. Just like in college!

Oh and of course: "In 2006, Muschany was a co-sponsor of legislation that toughened sex offender laws."

State rep charged with assaulting teen [St. Louis Post-Dispatch]

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Lace up your sneakers, Wonkers! Time to hit the streets. MoveOn, the ACLU, MomsRising and all your favorite dirty leftists are getting together for a yuuuuuuuuge march to show that WE ARE A NATION OF DECENT FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS WHO DON'T KIDNAP BABIES. And your Wonkette will be there!

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Rudy Giuliani, flapping his loose yap to Politico on Monday:

President Donald Trump's attorney Rudy Giuliani said on Monday that he was actually just bluffing last week when he called for Justice Department leaders to suspend special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation within 24 hours.

"I didn't think it would," Giuliani told POLITICO with a laugh when asked about the Mueller inquiry's still being very much an active investigation. "But I still think it should be." [...]

That's what I'm supposed to do," Giuliani explained on Monday. "What am I supposed to say? That they should investigate him forever? Sorry, I'm not a sucker."

Cool, that is just Rudy Giuliani admitting he's full of shit and words and more shit and more words (and also a noun, a verb and 9/11). We are guessing therefore that Giuliani, who is a lawyer, would legally advise us to continue assuming we should take his every oral ejaculation with a gi-normous grain of FULL OF SHIT.

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